March 31, 2006



mrrow.


yes, i am a girl.
this week matt and i have been discussing the year quite a bit. i asked him what he thinks about being coupled versus being single. he said it's pretty much the same except he has two more cars to take care of. and then he said "well, your cars don't need all that much work". uh huh and then...

yesterday i made the call to change the insurance on the cars. since summer gas prices are already here and climbing, i put the honda back on the road. it makes no sense to drive the nissan when it gets almost half the mileage. so i rearranged the insurances to make the honda legally driveable and the nissan covered if a tree falls on it. so today, the honda had it's first day out. and it's thumping. something is wrong with the brakes. matt was really excited.

March 30, 2006

jam-master T is here today. remember her, the one who awaits the rapture. she's here and i'm learning all about her wedding. in august. with the bridesmaids wearing red tube dresses. IN AUGUST. although probably they'd be just as horrible at any time of year. i weep for the main office tellers. their ears must bleed.

March 29, 2006

mr. matt sent the most beautiful flowers! was i supposed to buy hom something??? anyone?

March 28, 2006

i haven't mentioned the latest "do it yourself" banking class i've been taking, because i haven't been doing it. i finally started last week after it's been sitting untouched since JANUARY. and lo, it's ridiculously easy. i finished 4 chapters in less than an hour. i started to make a copy of my answer sheet to send in for correction when i noticed the backside of the answer sheet and another 4 chapters...uhoh. so i have an exciting evening planned studying banking regulation. and baking.

i made an avocado chicken salad thing for dinner last night. and matt asked to try it. WITH AVOCADOS IN IT. i'm floored. chicken was on sale this week so i bought a coop of it and now i have to think of exciting ways to use it. if you know any, feel free to forward.

i'm going to venture into the land of too much information and tell you wonderful people about my brassiere. it's driving me nuts. why the air pockets? WHY? and when you take them out, there's still all that extra fabric from the pocket holders.

that's all i've got going on today. banking and avocados and brassieres. and also tomorrow is the 12 monthaversary. keven wrote it on the shop calendar so matt won't forget. he's also been writing our initials in hearts on bits of paper and throwing them at matt periodically throughout the day. this apparently keeps kevin's mind off the cringe-worthy divorce he's going through right now. the circle comes full.

March 27, 2006

matt broke his self on saturday moving machinery, so on sunday he came shopping with me. and he thought this was the easy option, HA. we went to sam's where i bought 4 pounds of butter and spent the rest of the time marveling at the enormous amount of crap available in bulk. if we bought the things we buy there i don't know where we'd put them all. 64 klondike bars. WHY? but then who needs 4 pounds of butter?*

because i had him at my disposal all day and we were in bangor, we decided to go out to lunch. since we're pizza whores whenever we can be, we decided to go to pizza hut because we saw a new one at the mall. to be honest we had planned our whole day around pizza once we had spied it. and then when we were all hungry we drove up and it's not open yet. it was a pizza mirage. we ended up at sbarro, equally whore-ish and decidedly cheaper but just not the same. and then because it was community day the girlscouts were at the mall and because they practice some kind of mind power we bought more girlscout cookies. i knew they were there and that's why i wanted to avoid going in to the mall. so actually it's pizza hut's fault that i bought more girlscout cookies and two pairs of shoes on clearance at filene's. i doubt matt will ever choose shopping with me as the lazy option again. he'd probably be more relaxed moving thousand pound machines all day.



*for a skinny boy he really eats a lot of butter. poor arteries.

March 23, 2006



BABIES!

March 22, 2006

so, how long has it been? that long. well, what can i say? i've got nothing. but kirsten left me a comment on myspace that made me feel all funny and smart and now i feel compelled to write something. the only remotely interesting thought i have right now regards the groceries i just bought. what part of a tuna does the "tuna loin" come from?

things have been pretty quiet here, although spring is definitely on the way. you know it's a slow time of year when three customers come in to tell you that there were cruisers at the grocery store and they took someone away. probably for a bad check but i'd love to think she stole some tuna loins, the saucy wench!

good lord, it's only wednesday. the humanity.

March 14, 2006

yesterday i got my big book of home plans. i have marked the ones i like and well, that's most of them. i have 6 that i realllllly like and suit our mutual vision. i should tell matt he's got room to build me all of those houses. then i could visit myself and have me over for tea. or i guess i could pick one. he might even have an opinion. maybe.

today i am wearing the beautiful necklace that amy and kirsten sent me for christmas, and which i received yesterday. it was a really good day for packages. as a result i get to send mail, which is one of my favorite passtimes. i've been thinking about which stationary to use all night. instead of cleaning the living room or organizing the shed.

tonight, instead of cleaning the living room or organizing the shed, i'm going grocery shopping. i'm out of lettuce. and cucumbers. and organic yogurt. and i need more jiffy cornbread mix so i can make it for myself and eat it for dinner because if you count all the ingredients and the extra butter you hit all the food groups. it's alot easier than those croissants that take 12 hours to make. i should've known that simple and julia child recipe just don't go in the same sentence.

March 13, 2006

this weekend i ripped off a girlscout

i feel so guilty, you can't even imagine. the saga starts two weeks ago when mary read in the paper that there were going to be girlscouts at the grocery store on friday selling cookies. since sara and i weren't solicited by a girlscout (although we'd be prime targets because we've bought enough boyscout popcorn to last until 2020 and we don't even like it that much) we were without cookies. and you know there's only a small annual window of cookie selling, so we were a little desperate. i had it on my calendar for two weeks, waiting.

on friday afternoon i cashed out early so i could go and be ready for the scouts. i stalked them for for half an hour*, and lo they never came. mary and sara were very dissapointed, sara more than anyone because she's pregnant and you don't deny pregnant ladies cookies. it simply isn't the done thing. so i called the mall. they often have girlscouts selling cookies, and we lucked out. the girlscouts of the abanaki council will be there on march 25-26. and there i was, patiently waiting for two more weekends. and then yesterday sara called me from the road to tell me the scouts were at trenton market, and even in costume.

i battled with myself for a while before getting in the car and backtracking to trenton just to buy cookies at 3.50 a box. i bought five boxes.** the total was 17.50, i gave her a twenty. she gave me 3.50 change. i didn't count it until i got home. i was feeling really bad until sara said they almost cheated her a dollar so i'm hoping they break even in the end.



*this post was going to be called "stalking girlscouts" but i thought better of it.
**to which matt said "do we have enough?" they weren't all supposed to be be for us.

March 11, 2006

i came to the library to upload some pictures but it seems i can't. not from this computer anyway. bummer.

March 09, 2006

it has become a running joke between matt and myself that i can't stop buying soap. i bought some more ivory the other day (buy two bar sets and get a dollar off, that's 6 bars for $.94). it's not like we won't use it. eventually. whenever he asks me what my plans are i say "i have to go to the store, we're running out of soap." and he laughs uncomfortably while he decides whether or not i'm kidding.

holly talked me out of a four bottles of shampoo for 3 dollars deal, rationalizing that it's not a brand i use. she's right. and also, where would i put it. the cupboards are already teeming with personal products*. i counted nine open bottles/tubs/vats of hair products currently in use in my bathroom. they are all different. i did not include samples or trial versions in my count. i've been experimenting with using more than one. i'm trying to find the best combination so i can use twice as much product per day and thus lighten the load.**

these are the thoughts that fill my day. using up the hair gel and finding somewhere to stash all my soap. and then matt's grandmother gifted him a diamond ring. this part is kind of a long story: matt and his brother were bemoaning the tradition (?) of spending 3 months salary on an engagement ring. matt's mother assumes that he is upset because he can't afford one and the grandmother(who is very nice) gave him the ring as a gift because they all think he's desperate to propose but can't afford to. in fact the complaining isn't personal it's the injustice of the thing that pisses them off. however, his family must like me.

*is that phrase too vagisil to be used for soap and shampoo?
**i was telling matt this and i added that i needed to buy a clarifying shampoo to remove the layers of gel. he looked so sad i pretended i was kidding about buying more shampoo. but i'm not really, that shit takes a toll.

March 07, 2006

according to the referrals, someone is really interested in whether elvis ever dated a woman named sarah. can you imagine how many pages i have that say "sarah". i get the weirdest referrals from people googling elvis. but i'm getting used to it. i should start linking to information about the movie, the audio clip, everything having to do with "elvis has left the building" because it makes me sad that folks come here and get disapointed. they should get value for their clicks.

another frequent referral (right under "build your own ice luge" which i love) is "how do you pronounce gallaudet?". i feel bad about this one too because probably that page is a bit rude. i mean, maybe the deaf know more about french than i do. it's very hard to say, and as i have no deaf folks in proximity to ask, i guess i have to just hope i'm not offending anyone too much.

*for folks looking to pronounce the name of the college in DC it's Gal Law Det, not Guy a Det a la francais.
according to pinky and fark.com jen jones was made homecoming king. that rocks. the article is so funny because we know all those people and it's just like being there to read what they say. the irony is that none of those students who opposed the majority vote have ever looked through the old yearbooks in the library where there are a number of satin pant clad young women parading as princes and kings of the homecoming court BEFORE men were allowed even to commute. they revived the tradition but forgot the history. i suppose that's to be expected.

however, it's awesome for jen. she was always kind and respectful and a wonderful model of a hood student, with or without a dick.

March 06, 2006

did i mention i have to give a speech tomorrow. about the myriad lessons learned in my stupid tuesday morning class. i was really hoping to get hit by a bus before this day arrived. or get a new job. or, well, anything besides have to give a speech about what the "customer" has taught me. all bullshit ideas welcome, i'm desperate. there were no qualifying factors of length or anything like that. it's not like they can fail me, or fire me for not getting what they want me to get out of the class. or maybe they can. i don't know. reckon i can google "generic graduation speech" ? 17 hours counting.
the grocery shopping was so thrilling this saturday, i'm practically shaking with anticipation to blog about it. i had my big fish moment of coupon savings, the transaction that all other coupons will be compared to. i got my sales flyer on saturday because i was at another branch on friday, but it's ok because if i had known the taco shells were on sale for a dollar on friday i would have made matt come with me to ellsworth on friday night just so i could buy them. you see, i had a coupon for a dollar off. this is what i dream of every sunday whilst i clip. i was so excited i almost called holly from the aisle. but it was only 8:30 and i just don't think she'd ever forgive me. i really have to take up crocheting.

in other weekend news, we hiked up matt's mountain to see where he wants to build a house. it was 3.5 miles and i spent many of those miles on my ass. slippery slippery mountains. since my suffering was so great, i talked him into building a slightly larger house than he really wanted. he decided my happiness was worth a few square feet here and there. bless him. the site was very pretty, but it's going to be the longest driveway in the history of driveways. we also bought a book of house plans. i love house plans, i may never be able to put this book down. in the hours i should be blogging i'll be trying to decide whether i like this foyer or that one. it should be a good distraction from the coupon thing. he's a tricky matt.

March 03, 2006

i'm at the no fun branch all day. because they're a person down. so my branch is now a person down. and it makes me ANGRY.

March 02, 2006

actually, there isn't much more of a story than i fell on my ass and when i tried to push myself up my hand was stuck to the ice. it was just like that time sarah said it was so cold that she had survival panic and my hand stuck to the optometrist's doorknob (evil fucking optometrists) except this time i broke my butt too. two birds, one stone. i tried to buy some dainty gloves last night. like ice skaters wear. but they don't sell them in march. every store is chock full of bathing suits. we're having the worst weather of the winter and they're stocking swimsuits. (i really want to type "Red Commie Bastards" here but probably it's not all that applicable)

in other news my shoulder is broken again. i'm thinking about a bubble bath and i'm very nearly drooling on my station. i really have to call the chiropractor. i've always wanted to go and now i have a reason and i won't make the call. dumb dumb dumb. and to top it all off i brought in the wrong tom robbins book to mail, i thought i sold skinny legs and all but it was half asleep in frog pajamas. rats.
i'm working at another branch this morning, due to the stupid training program we all have to take. i'll be back later with a story about how my hand was stuck to the frozen ground yesterday, i always feel weird about blogging from other branches.