big apple has a jerry's kids buy a balloon from senator kerry. how nice of him to stop by.

i don't care if your wife is a lazy bitch, if she hasn't signed a check made out to both of you, you can't have the money. 'nuff said.

i'm told that on the water its supposed to be perfect storm type weather, but since i don't have a boat i can't test the theory. the bay is whitecapping which is extremely rare so there must be some fun waves out of schoodic.
when i was home i got another polling call. my mom told them i voted already. which is true, since i'm an absentee voter, but can you imagine how confused the poller was? it's sort of anticlimactic voting by mail. all the waiting. i'm ready for the nonsense to be over. but then there's still some time for bush to be hit with some freak lightning or a bus or something.
my mom was so much better this weekend, she even sent me out for cake. yay for drugs. we did alot of shopping. and annie enjoyed the wonders of a land with no sales tax. and in a fit of tourism we went to salem and walked around the willows. i wanted to take annie to some of the other sites but it was crazy busy. and there was no where to park. there were alot of kids dressed up as harry potter, but then maybe that isn't weird for downtown salem. go witches!

i'm told that on the water its supposed to be perfect storm type weather, but since i don't have a boat i can't test the theory. the bay is whitecapping which is extremely rare so there must be some fun waves out of schoodic.
when i was home i got another polling call. my mom told them i voted already. which is true, since i'm an absentee voter, but can you imagine how confused the poller was? it's sort of anticlimactic voting by mail. all the waiting. i'm ready for the nonsense to be over. but then there's still some time for bush to be hit with some freak lightning or a bus or something.
my mom was so much better this weekend, she even sent me out for cake. yay for drugs. we did alot of shopping. and annie enjoyed the wonders of a land with no sales tax. and in a fit of tourism we went to salem and walked around the willows. i wanted to take annie to some of the other sites but it was crazy busy. and there was no where to park. there were alot of kids dressed up as harry potter, but then maybe that isn't weird for downtown salem. go witches!

i received two kickass pieces of mail yesterday! one was my ballot, and the other from pinky. i've always wanted to be a tar heel! i also learned that the thirsty whale does indeed have t-shirts, and caps, and mugs and ashtrays.
i watched secret window last night. mostly on fastforward. it's the suspense that gets you. and it was getting dark. i can't deal with mr. creepy secret window and the dark and the coyotes.
oh sarah, i can't remember if i told you already, but do you remember that barn on the road to annie's house that wouldn't end and there was a birdie on the roof and we were worried that the birdie would cause it to fall. it finally fell. it was very sad.
i finished the first half of my banking class. i'm waiting for my midterm to arrive. mary is practicing looking mean and tsking because she's going to be my proctor. if it weren't for mary i could not stand being a bank teller. she's the best.

i have reached the point where i really like my hair. it's very twenties. or something. this is the point where i should find a real hair cutter person who doesn't charge an extra 2 dollars for a shampoo. and i should say "see this, this is what i want, help me?"
our part-timer has ovarian cancer, which sucks alot. i pulled another flea of kitty, which sucks but not as much. and i can't seem to get into blogging since i left my house sunday with my mom in tears. i'm prefering to just read harry potter obsessively and pet the kitty. and finding little jobs to do at work. one of them was alphabetizing the signature cards which were very bad indeed, because they were done by tia who does not know the alphabet.
in happy news i opened a box from hood with all the stuff from my walls and pictures and that poem of sorts emily miller wrote about the dead deer. and i found a bunch of disks that probably have all my important work on them, packed right next to all my magnets. err.

These are some of the funny/weird keywords i've gotten lately. the second one, i really don't understand at all but i'm very happy that otter scrubber came through twice. funny.

i hate passing out
string pants fell down work -his pants -wife
otter scrubber (twice)
elvis job
blue hill hippies

i am now capable of watching the debates, in the luxury of my own home. i have accessed the antennae. it's fuzzy, but hell, i'll be able to see dick cheney foaming. i just don't see how he could win, he's so evil and edwards looks so nice. cheney looks like he eats kittens for breakfast. the man is a kitten eater. bastard. i just had to do some work so i don't remember where i was going with that. so i'll move on.
i permanantly damaged annie's hearing last night. i accidentally screamed into the phone when kitty took a running jump at the glass door trying to kill the neighbors cat. she's very athletic when she's full of furry rage, she jumped about four feet. i also woke up to her licking the inside of my ear. do you think that's cause for concern? maybe he new name will have to be wet willy.

Bar Harbor is having it's own Run Against Bush tomorrow at 10 am next to the ymca. there might be one near you too. rock on leftist agitators.

watch mr. blog turn in to vast unmanagable rumor mill as i add to town gossip...miguels is closing for the winter, no surprise there, but also the thirsty whale! and rupinuni's is going to stay open all year. and havana till january. shocking.

according to the rumor mill, the super walmart deal for ellsworth has been sneakily put through and we will soon have a mega-evil super walmart and another lovely abandoned building on the road to acadia. i heart capitalism.

(and yes i know i need to stop going there. i do, i know it. i'm working on it.)

we have been uber busy. but we got to get lunch from testa's, which was very high class. i recomend them highly. and very attentive staff. and good mints. they were chocolatey.
but anyway, i can't think straight (haha) so i really oughtn't to blog. but i wanted to know if anyone saw the debates. reports are that kerry beat bush bad. real bad. and that bush is a very pouty sore ass loser. i didn't get to see them, although i think i need to try out getting a cable and seeing if there's an antenna on the roof i can patch in to. that would be cool.
i also want to note that there are these very odd, but uplifting in a weird sort of way, home-made signs on the light posts on rte. 3.

they say:

NO

Cheney
Ashcroft
Rumsfeld
Bush.

the new low carb diet. hehe...

You are Frankfurter Spectacular!! Wrapping hot
dogs around a pineapple doesn't make it
Spectacular any more than sticking feathers up
your butt will make you a chicken. Quit trying
to be something you're not and just RELAX
already!


What Weight Watchers recipe card from 1974 are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


oh dear...oh dear...oh dear. is it worse, or better than Mackerelly?

for the interest of all bar harbor residents, or just matt really, Gringo's is delivering again. praise the god of burritos and smoothies!

mary and i have been researching the horrors of gallbladder disease. it sounds really awful.
one of our customers was just trying to sell me on blockbuster e rentals, because he knows i do netflix. it's freaky how well people get to know you at a bank. or maybe it's just a small town. the post office guys always say they'll bring popcorn if i invite them over. it's not even really winter yet and the townies are desperate for entertainment.
speaking of desperate, i'm getting desperate for light in my bathroom. something happened a few weeks ago causing all the lights and plugs to stop working. i haven't gotten around to calling my landlord because a. my apartment is too messy to have him over and b. because i really don't like him, or c. because deep down i'm just lazy. in a fit of light getting motivative action i asked one of the downstairs ladies if she has the fuse box in her apartment. she said that she has "her" fuse box, but not mine. she said it's in my closet. but i don't have a closet, or a fuse box. i'm sure i would have noticed. it's a very small apartment, if there was a closet i just hadn't noticed i'm be f'd up indeed. i'm going to ask mrs. prison term later. she's nice, she might have my fuse box. and then i'll call the landlord. i should add that in addition to the darkness, parts of the electric wall plug sort of fell off. but if i can have light without having mr. slow landlord taking apart my bathroom i swear i won't use that plug. ever. and i'll keep the extinguisher handy. i promise.

our part time person is in the hospital. she was getting her galbladder out...but they stopped and did some biopsies and said "it doesn't look good". what kind of vague hospital speak is that. and now they're sending her home for a week to wait for the results. that just sucks.

i spent my evening singing "it's not unusual to be fuzzed by anyone" to kitty and drinking orange juice. i think she really likes tom jones. but she seemed very bummed out that i came home early. what kind of dual life could she be leading? she's so weird. ooh but i discovered that she won't set paw on the chairs i covered and she isn't scratching the rug from my dorm room like she does the industrial carpet. maybe she has an eye for quality or something.
the very exciting visit of the queen mary is now over and it seems that it was not the economic boom that was expected. the reports are either no better, or definitely worse than usual. which means it will be a very long winter.

yesterday when i left work early with my stuffy nose and acorn squash from mary's garden i saw about 40 cars parked on rt 3. taking pictures of the cruise ship anchored off the porcupines. only it wasn't the queen mary 2. it was the silver whisper. i hope they aren't too dissapointed.

one of my jamaican boyfriends invited me to a party. maybe if i didn't feel like so blah.

home. but first, boston. i drove a long way in the rain. the house and people annie is staying with are all very nice. and then we went to boston to see the folk festival which had been moved inside umb. or umass boston which, to date, is the bigges, emptiest college campus i have ever seen. and would you believe that almost the first person we saw upon entering the festival was the guy who sells happy island cow ice cream off the stonington pier? it's a small damn world.
and sunday we spent with my family eating and shopping. my meme bought rainbow fleece gloves, a pink vest, and pink polyester pajamas, and wore out annie who was in charge of her. she's very peppy. for 85. my mommy was worn out too, from her treatment which causes alot of pain apparently, but doesn't make her throw up. she looked so tired. and she didn't eat anything. and it makes my heart heavy to think about my mommy being in so much pain.

someone at the holiday inn is desperately interested in mr. blog. wonder who that could be?

yesterday someone left me a present on my car. a button that says "regime change 2004". i was so excited. it's the little things that make me like bar harbor. like the yellow people walking warning signs and all the people have hula hoops. who wouldn't heart that.
mary swears she killed a black widow in the kitchen yesterday, but i didn't want to take a closer look to verify it. do we think black widows live in maine? it left a remarkably large stain on the carpet, it was something big whether it was widowed or not.
one of my neighbors is a spy for the landlord. which is making me sort of nervous. she called to inform the landlord that our other neightbor had been arrested. which isn't really any of his business, and also would be in all of the local papers anyway. and now she who got arrested won't have her lease renewed. considering the housing situation, it was a very mean thing to do. it's one of the things that makes me wish i hadn't made connections to my neighbors. i'd rather not be part of all this petty crap.

i finished this book that i really didn't enjoy. so why did i finish it, i don't know. but then i got to the end and i read the jacket and learned that the author is dead. and now i feel bad about telling everyone how much i hated it. it was choppy, and repetitive. but maybe the guy died before editing was complete and they published it anyway. and since the poor guy died and it wasn't his fault the editing was bad i think i owe it to him to read another of his books just to check. is that weird, do we think? regardless i think i'll pick up another of his books later. if only to torture myself.
on saturday one of my neighbors got arrested. and last night she got let out. and her computer was stolen. my money is on the ex. when she asked if i'd seen anyone around, she didn't ask if i'd specifically seen the ex. but it would have to be someone who knew she wasn't home. i guess it could have been one of the other neighbors, but i don't think any of them would find value in a computer. we're waiting for the paper to come out so we can check police beat and see what she was arrested for. because we're nosy. and also police beat is good reading. very entertaining.

we are having a supremely bizarre day. some old guy on vacation tried to bully us into letting him make a collect call. if you behave oddly in a bank, the tellers will think that you are going to rob them. when people demand to use the phone or the bathroom or an illegal wire transfer or whatever, it makes us nervous. or even non-customers asking for change. you wouldn't believe how pissed off people get when you have to tell them no. getting all grumpy with a bank teller gets you put on a list of suspicious persons. it's not a good idea. just so you all know.

i'm glad you like your mug pinky, it was the last one. we asked the shopkeeper to get it out of the window. we were playing the aggressive tourists, just for you.

re: matt and munchkin cards, actually my meeting is tonight. so maybe cards, are in the cards. ha ha err.

strip clubs and bird hunting. it is indeed fowl hunting season, and bow hunting. which i assume means you can kill anything you want as long as you use an arrow. and it isn't an endangered species. not that i imagine the latter keeps many hunters awake at night. people used to hint at having killed blue herons that ate their koi. that's the problem with spending thousands of dollars on something that you then leave outside. in a pond. where the birdies just think it's a colorful easy to catch dinner. but i digress from my intended topic, which is actually annie in boston. thus far she has survived one day's commute and is very much liking her host family. she also says that everyone is stressed out there and maine is indeed the way life should be. even if we are sometimes bored out of our minds. i suppose we could spend more time shoveling.
annie's only been gone a few days and i'm learning that it's trying to be your own activities director. she's got herself a part time job restoring a historic house on the weekends for one of her bosses. there are about 200 bank classes i could take. err.

our jamaican customers are scared to death. the phone lines haven't been working since yesterday and no one can reach their families. i'd be scared to death too.

town is dead. i don't know if it's the weather or the season in general which has been really slow. most places are hoping to close early. according to the farmer's almanac it's supposed to start snowing in october. a super snowy winter would really complete the end of the world weather pattern. maybe i should have pre-bought some propane.
i'm thinking of getting a kitten. to keep kitty company. or maybe she'll hate it and try to eat it. it's a hard call to make.

and then all my hair was gone. i think the hair cutting lady mistook me for someone else, because she seriously went to town on my hair. it's wicked short. if i wasn't so schocked i'd really hate it. there is no curl. it is too short to curl. and winter is coming. i need my hair for warmth. i keep seeing it in the shiny glass and freaking out. i'm scaring myself. odds on this doesn't publish?

and also, why do i think the asshole who searched "knee jerk liberal pictur" is the same one who was searching "dirty gay truck driver" last week. those tricksy conservatives.

"Raise your hand if you think Amy and I will pass our exam tomorrow? You know, the one about the dinosaurs who wandered all over Pangea in order to find their Nazi-Buddhist brethren and take over India so that Christianity could come there? There will also be a section on the bodhisattvas: these are the people who see their nirvana a few yards in the distance and so they stop their spiritual evolution right there. "Whoa there, Nirvana! We must help the others." So they go back to the Old West in order to save all the cowboys from the world of maya."

kristen null and void is so funny. nothing like reading archives from hood.

it is a see your breath morning. too cold. fortunately i have bar harbor's ugliest mug in which to make tea and be merry and warm. it has a ceramic moose drinking a cup of coffee glued to it's side. annie was impressed with it's ugliness. she was also impressed with my studiousness last night. i did two weeks of bank class. in an hour. i'm gonna be a banking genius.

that girl that pissed me off the other day asked what my favorite aspects of the job were and i inquired whether perhaps she's interested in banking and would she like an application? hehe. and then she said "oh no, i just wanted to know if you're happy?" and then i punched her. maybe next time. it's possible that maybe she touched a nerve. but it was still rude. and i'm definitely still going to beat her up. or at the very least give her a mean look if she comes in again. grr..
my goal today, being the 1st of september, is to go out and take in the sales at the crappy stores all on main street and find a dumb maine mug for my desk. i want the worst one. i want one with moose antlers for a handle. or a lobster painted on the side with a word bubble that says i love baa haabaa. or maybe one of those lighthouse, blueberry, lobster combinations that really give you a multidimensional feel for maine.

one of our favorite customers, brother of vocab man, has a new girlfriend. she comes in with him every day (don't these people have jobs?) and yesterday she mocked my job. twice. it is a bad idea to get on the badside of your bank teller. very bad.

i'm cranky. but fortunately there are some things to look forward to. 2 new dvd's from netflix. one of which is margaret cho so we know that's a good time. and i got my ballot today. only the state primary, but still i get to vote for her. she's 94. she was hysterical on the radio. the other candidates i know nothing about. i'll have to google them. yay for voting.

the good thing about telling hippies how much they owe on their overdraft is that they don't get upset. they just say "dude". i think more people should say dude in banks.

i just met a very nice man who works as first mate on a schooner. the problem is he doesn't have an address. and really, how would you get mail as a sailor? it's a quandary.

i was reading this and you know, it's really very much what maine is like politically. which freaks me the hell out because some of the other swinger articles have been scary. but they hit maine right on. you see those "bush lies: who dies?" stickers every where. and it cracks me up that they went to the bangor state fair. what i really can't wait for is the one about NH. i wonder which way NH will go. they really hate taxes. alot. but they also really hate stupid spending. they like state's rights, but then mr. b isn't all about that mainstay of republicanism is he? and he wants to shut down the state's 2nd biggest employer. it's so tricky.

i think i saw my first flea this morning. the neighbor cat has fleas. and the neighbor apartment has fleas. and i believe mine is next. and i'm not pleased. kitty doesn't look itchy, but it might be a matter of time. i don't want fleas in my house, i really don't. tell me, how do you flea comb a hamster? how do you flea bath a hamster? it is not going to be cool.
i am not pleased with my neighbor.

the bar harbor post office is a nebulous dark hole. and that's all i have to say about that.

the guy who owns the hippie store, or rather one of the hippie stores, said i'm a bad bamboo mommy. i have a cute tiny little bamboo plant on my desk. and i want it to stay that way. he said it needs a bigger pot. but then it will grow. and it's not allowed to grow. if you start cultivating bamboo you end up with a jungle. then he called me a bamboo nazi. but he's a nice guy really. he greets us everyday with "hello you beautiful women" and he says it in a way that i don't want to smack him.

"and then i was a pirate whore"

you can't say tia isn't funny. she has her moments.

you know it's going to be a long winter when you can see your breath in august. granted it was was 7 this morning, but really. it's august. and climate change isn't happening. i wish i could've seen john kerry on the daily show. who doesn't love jon stewart? i just realised how unnerving the election is going to be listening to npr. maybe anthony's will show it instead of football and i can watch the results with 50 of my closest friends, and pizza.
you know how every other day i say i almost got run over by tourists. well yesterday i had to run out from under the wheels of an F150 with MAINE plates. i was in the crosswalk and the guy slowed down to a stop before the crosswalk and i thought "how nice, i can walk safely to the other side of the street". until vroom vroom and i couldn't think of anything to do but run for the yellow line. i didn't even have time to swear. he didn't even look upset. there really aren't that many accidents in town for all the driving atrocities, actually i can't think of any. the only accidents have been in the park, of all places. someone accidentally drove off a cliff, but they were fine. you see it all the time. "oh honey, look at the sunset! isn't it pretty..." and then they're halfway down a mountain or flipped in the gravel. it's sad.

her: "you're saying i look like an ass" plays with her skirt
him: "you look fine, you don't look like an ass" focuses on trunk of car
me: stifled laughter as i pass on the sidewalk.
and then they got back in their car and drove away.

tourists.

i was going to take a shower after my run, and i almost had an aneurysm. there is a bug that could be measured by inches on my shower's ceiling. huge man, huge. i'm not sure what it is, but i'm going to keep telling myself it's not a spider. there is also something large and scratchy in the roof, which has kitty on her guard. so it's very tense at our house just now. i have barricaded the bug in the bathroom, after putting a towel over my head and rushing in to save kitty's potty. i shut the door and stuffed a rug in the crack. paranoid, me? i need an annie or a sarah to remove it for me. although i don't think even sarah would go near this puppy. mammoth, i'm telling you. you know that song from the prehistoric beasts commercial, i can hear the bug humming it through the door and the rug. it's fucked up. seriously.
we were busy today, and so i couldn't keep a train of thought long enough to blog about anything. you know i must be scattered if my usual posts seem really well composed in comparison. at the moment i can't stop thinking about a bulging bug filled sac in the attic. ungulating, i think that's the word i'm really thinking about. you know it's a good blog when the word ungulating is in the text.
so we were busy today. we're getting a new employee, so soon tia will be gone. they're only part time though, so we won't be able to get sick or have any on the job injuries. mary's planning a cold for three thursdays from now and i expect a rash on the second wednesday in october. but maybe that's only funny if you spent your whole day in a bank.

"elvis was gay" is my favorite key word.

busy busy bo busy fa nana fanna fo fizzy me mi mo mizzy, busy.

because i'm a masochist i read some more of that bastard patrick mcevoy's blog. he called the native people of new mexico savages. and then he said "I highly doubt that guy believed in God, with the amount of gayness he was portraying and all" after rambling on about a tall mexican guy for no apparent reason. arghh...

so we got to hang out in tias new branch and have our meeting. that branch is girly. and country cute. ours is way cooler. way more chic, if a bank can be chic.

in other news the huge yacht (the 6th biggest in the world) that was tendering off the pier is owned by a russian billionaire. apparently no one told him the cool kids go to northeast harbor with their yachts. or maybe the yacht was too big for the harbor. crazy russians. sarah, remember those boats docked at the pier? those were the size of this guys tender. damn, that's a big boat.

we all just received a fun facts worksheet to fill out for the company newsletter. mary and i are trying to think of exciting hobbies we could pretend to have. she has windsurfing and street luging, while i have rock climbing and breatharianism. we're so exciting.

so i was playing with my stats, as i am wont to do, when the day's business sputters and dies and i'm left with only my internet addiction for company. and i found a referral from this site. and i read alot of it. too much of it in fact. trying to find a link to me. i had to read about gay this and gay that. and how michael moore should be killed. and i thought, how did this guy find me? he must be one of the many people who have searched gay dogs mating (which randomly enough is a very popular referral for me) because he reads like a serious closet case who would have the imagination to search for gay dogs, mating. but i didn't find a link, not a one.
and then i noticed a referral from this blog and this one. and i think i figured it out. it's that silly next blog button on the top of the new blogger navigation bar thing. atleast i think is. if anyone can confirm that, let me know.
and i was all excited for an anonymous blog rumble, with the socialist left bloggers taking on the homophobic rush limbaugh bloggers. rats.

or you don't even get invited to cocktail parties because people think you're a dirty hippie.

one of our college of the atlantic students was getting a check for his tuition today and he asked if he could put "for nothing" on the memo line. he said some people go to college and get jobs afterwards. and i said my education qualified me just enough to be entertaining at a cocktail party and then he said the above which cracked me up.

mr. matt just visited me and oooh is it ever weird. not bad weird, good weird. it's nice to connect e-people to real people.

i've been trying to read the paper more because i am feeling vacant and unworldly, but damn it's depressing. they found that missing girls body (her dad is being excorted from prison to attend the funeral), an 11 year old boy is accused of raping two younger boys, the car accident with the 17 year old girl who was not wearing her seatbelt and was seen flying from the car. sometimes it's a blessing to have no damn idea what's going on.

and because i'm a snotty bitch: we were just chiding tia about tonights meeting. because she's being a poo. we've known about the meeting for about two weeks. she with her three calendars didn't write it down and is crabbing because she's supposed to go work out. the irony is that one of our customers, who is an old employee, was telling mary that he wouldn't put up with her behavior as an employer. oooh validation. but she'll soon be gone and hopefully she'll learn something about how you treat people in a professional environment.

nein leiberschift!

very confused german man. the only words i know in german are no and pencil. and danke shane, but i'm sure that's misspelled.

i can't cash your check, even if it is from loew's. (which incidentally does not exist in maine)

yesterday at the supermarket i overheard a very amusing conversation. it was about bait. perhaps the conversation wasn't as amusing as the situation. two families, who had apparently ordered a large shipment of bait together, were discussing the division of the delivery while in line at the supermarket. ooh and it gets better. mr. and mrs. j. crew on vacation were in between the two families. (*if you live on the island you know that even if there are six million people with groceries there will only be two lines open and one of them will have an old lady paying by check in slow, shaky handwriting only to find when she's finished writing she accidentally wrote the name of the old grocery store and has to write a new check) ok so i'm in the slow lane, behind the old lady, and the chatty bait people are in the next lane. the bait people are talking about shoveling the bait, and how you can't ever get the smell off the shovel, or your hands, or your clothes, not to mention your lawn where the bait is waiting to be shovelled. they're laughing and carrying on and joking about all that dead rotting fish. mrs. j. crew on vacation begins to look visibly ill. mr. j. crew on vacation asks her what's wrong. mrs. looks over her shoulder in disgust. but ahh, the first bait family is in front of them and she gets caught. mrs. bait family, with her baity hand, reaches over and touches her arm and asks if she's ok. and the rest i didn't get to see because i had to pay for my groceries. nothing like fish guts to make a vacation worthwile.

so i set up the rss feed which is to your left, for live journal folks. i hope it works for you matt.

i've been publishing stuff, and it doesn't show up. so i rewrite it a thousand times and then they all show up later. and i thought that this one would show up later, but no dice. so i'm fixing it. i also intended to put up matt's link quite a while ago, so i'll do that now.

we just had these two poor guys that ran about three blocks in the rain to cash their checks. the checks are on the counter, drying. the boys are back out in the rain. this is supposed to be the end of bonnie. if this is the tail end of the storm i can't imagine how it was at it's height. damn.

if it is raining, snowing, sleeting, apocolypse...every customer will say "what a beautiful day". fact.

if i can figure out the syndication thing and it doesn't cost me any money i'll do it.

it is rainy and dark out. dark like it's january. dark like the storm of the century. but atleast the rain held off enough for my family to visit. i keep forgetting it's friday the 13th. actually it's my brothers birthday. and he's doing much better according to my mom. he got employee of the month at building 19, which i think only sarah can really appreciate.

they found the missing girls car, in a river. with her not in it. but it's weird because the lobstermen didn't see it there two days ago and they have radar on their boats. they didn't publish it this way but it sounds like it just ended up the water recently. creepy.

when i post it disappears. very dissapointing.

i baked a cake. a chocolate cake with a whole stick of butter in it. the frosting had only a 1/3 cup of butter. i only had one piece, and i think it was enough cakey goodness to last me forever. mary liked it.
i forgot to bring a book to work yesterday and i was bored out of my mind. so bored i couldn't think of anything to blog about. nothing at all of interest or import. and if i hadn't baked the cake of heart failure i wouldn't have anything to blog about today either. it has become that time of year that you don't want to leave your house. it's the time of year when a trip to bangor takes less time than a trip into bar harbor. i'm dreading doing my laundry. i think i need to develop a twitch like holly uses on the T so people will leave me alone.
a teenage girl has gone missing in the milbridge area. she's gone, her cars gone, and her cell phone hasn't been used since saturday. they have it set up that if she touches a button it will alert them to where she is. they have the county atv clubs out searching all the dirt roads for her. it's very sad.

everyone is here and my niece is so fat. she's got the chubbiest legs. she can't really sit up yet, but if you position her just right the fatness of her little legs hold her upright.

i got another hit for "make your own ice luge". i think it's fabulous. another fabulous one is "Elvis Lady Killer Glasses". who wouldn't want glasses like that?

the family is coming today. in my sisters new minivan. but actually my mom isn't sure it's a minivan. she said she didn't know what a minivan was. my mother. i'm starting my hunger strike now.
i cleaned the daylights out of the house, including brushing the kitty and hamster. hamster really doesn't like being brushed. we have a tiny toothbrush with soft bristles for her. you wouldn't think a hamster would have fur problems but sometimes she looks so messy. they must clean themselves like kitties and other fur people, i've just never witnessed it. she did do the cutest thing yesterday. i gave her a piece of paper towel and she shoved it into her tube and wrapped herself up lit it was a blanket. who says hamsters aren't fun?

on my way to bangor today i saw a kid with a broken leg holding a car wash sign on his wheelchair. i wonder if his leg was really broken or if it just helps attract customers. when i drove by again it was a different kid, who looked completely ambulatory. i guess the wheelchair kid was just on lunch break. they had him parked on a hill next to the highway and i really hope he didn't roll in to traffic.

also, my neighbor's car has been leaking gas for about two weeks. and today i noticed an uncapped gas can by her front door. and if that wasn't scary enough, she's the only one of us who smokes. ironic.

some fools talked their way into martha stewart's house and now they're in jail. i read all about it in police beat. apparently the help caught on, but not before they got a tour of the house. police beat is usually very entertaining. someone got stuck in their bedrail and required assistance, a little boy locked himself in the bathroom, it's good fun.

we watched this movie last night as the last of our first fling with netflix. and it was really good. it was teeming with goodness. sarah you must see this movie. now. go and get it right now. we watched aimee and jaguar the other night and i'm really glad we saved big eden for last. we knew that aimee and jaguar wasn't going to end well, but it was chock full of sadness and the subtitles weren't very good. if we spoke better german, we might have liked it better.
but now i want to think about big eden again and how it filled my heart with joy. sigh...

i broke and sort of repaired my bike yesterday, all in pursuit of making it work on the stationary trainer thing. suffice it to say that it is going to take alot more work and the buying of some probably very expensive parts. there is also a ball bearing that sort of fell out. but it seems ok with out it.

the kitty is no longer at all pink. which i'm sorry to say i'm a little disappointed about. who wouldn't want a pink kitty.
we watched the first of our netflix movies last night, which unfortunately was Camp. however cute the gay boys were. we were at a disadvantage. we just don't know enough about broadway to have really enjoyed it. we have bigger hopes for big eden and aimee and jaguar.
i've also got to mention that i'm getting tired of the rude people. there's this sign in hulls cove that is up every summer and it says "summer people, some are not" and you know i'm really beginning to agree. it's true we need their money, but i'll be damned if it's worth being treated like dirt all summer.

i didn't think lightening could strike twice in one day, but i met bathroom lady's not so nice older sister at the laundry mat. it all happened after work, when i was trying to do my laundry as quickly as possible and go home. as i'm watching my clothes spin and get all frothy, a middle-aged couple come in to the laundromat (one word, two words, i don't know). they look down the first row of washers to where i am sitting. the woman of the couple looks at a machine with a big white sign that says "broken" and she looks at me and says "is this broken?" and i nod my head. and she walks away and then the couple sort their laundry and then come back to my row of washers and proceed to place their laundry in two of the most expensive machines which are there for rugs and quilts and the like. and then the woman looks at me and says "how much does this cost?" by then a youngish blond guy is also stuffing about 50 lbs of clothes in to the expensive machines and we both point to the 3'X3' orange sign that says $3.00. and they whine about how much that is for a load of laundry and say the machine can't possible take 35 lbs of laundry, and then she looks at me again and shouts "DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?" and the blond boy and i are stunned and he says "go over there" pointing to the cheaper washers and i say "i speak english, can you read?" and the blond boy laughed but i'm not sure if the rudest woman in the whole world heard me or not. i should have demanded an apology. i should have punched her. i should have said "just because i don't want to talk to you, does not mean i don't speak english." grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

we just enountered a whole new area of rudeness. a new genre of rude, if you will. i've talked about the parking, and talked and talked. i've talked about making change, fees, and such things. i don't think i mentioned the lady who was mad at us because she took out too much money at the atm and we couldn't put it back into her account at home, but i hope we can all see where that went. but this one is new, it's about the bathroom. so on with the rant.
this lady used the atm. she was about to walk out the door when she turned to walk in to the bank. i was watching her asthough i knew something icky was about to happen. this happens sometimes when people want change, or a good restaurant reccomendation, or ask us to fix their cellphones. but she came in to ask if we had a bathroom. first of all, who thinks bank= public restroom? a gas station definitely, restaurant, a park, but not a bank. so i say "no" because we don't have a public bathroom. if it was an older person, a child, someone who looked like they were going to lose their cookies, we would help. a young person with two working legs we send to the pier or the police station where there are really very nice public bathrooms. so i directed her to the nearest restrooms which are at the pier and she says "so you walk all the way there, huh?" and i said "mhmm yeah" with a big smile on my face while she turned her back and made that "tsh" noise that i can't grasp very well with letters.
after she was gone mary yelled "you're on vacation, chill out" but i don't think she heard us. who has the energy to be so grumpy on vacation? when the cute british have real problems, like the atm not giving them money, they are so much more calm. they're in a foreign country and they can't get money, and you have to walk 20 feet to pee, get your priorities in order damn it.

i'm trying to decide if i can stand to take a class with tia this fall. now the idea of taking a whole class on banking makes me nervous, but a class that i know from the get go is going to involve tia is a different story. it could be really amusing. like when she asks questions like "am i hispanic?" when in fact she has has "whitey" tattooed on her forehead. i have a feeling it will be like at hood when we took cultures of india and our classmates said things like "if they worshipped cows why did they make them pull the carts?" and "if they had the bible why weren't they christian?". i have a feeling tia would ask questions just like this. and it would shorten my life expectancy.

i replaced mr.phone this weekend. i asked for the biggest one they had and it's still about 3/4's of the size of the old one. why so small, why? i also asked for the one that could take the most abuse but i think she thought i was kidding.
today i accidentally painted the kitty, and now she's pink. she doesn't seem to mind, and really it wasn't my fault that she used to wet red canvas to rub her face on. we've always said that red was her color, and now more than ever.
and if that wasn't exciting enough, they've started to move out the trailers. it's going to take a really long time to get them all gone but it's a step. there were about 20 guys out there, and one driving a tractor. he seemed to be the only one doing any actual work, except for the guy that yelled "whoa" every time the trailer rammed into the trees or the porch or was about to fall over and crush the 20 guys hanging around. the lady who lives below me was shouting to the "whoa" guy about her ex and how he's a jerk and mr. whoa ignored her spectacularly. actually all of the women were shouting at the hanging around guys telling them to get to work and it was me, who was left defending their honor. ironic.

ahh, yes, blogging.  i remember it well.  i just had to spell original for tia.  it often happens that i have to spell words for her, but i've been noticing that each time i spell the word i say it before i spell it, spell it, and then say it again sounding out all the syllables.  like i'm a kindergarten teacher or something.  we got the news today that as soon as they find a replacement for her here, she will be leaving.  but actually, that could take weeks, months even.  for some reason no one wants to work in bar harbor.  i wonder if it's the evil tourists.  hmm.
evil like the lady from new jersey who parked in our space all day yesterday.  and who was there this morning.  and upon who's car i placed three kind but stern notices.  and who yelled "that's my car" whilst i was doing so.  (and as an aside, "that's my car" only says to me that you are the idiot who parked under the towing sign and now i shall focus my animosity at you in person.)  ok, so she said "that's my car" and i said "you'll have to move it, this is bank parking"  and she said "i was just getting out a rug" and i said "well actually these spaces are just for bank business" and she said "well that's why i'm moving".  it was really very unsatisfying.  unlike the people from pennsylvania who looked genuinely scared that we were going to tow them.  i would have really enjoyed watching her car get towed away.  and then mary just said "we are surrounded by morons"  and "do you think the bank pays for psychiatric treatment, can you get workers comp for going postal over parking?"  and this is why i love my boss. 
in really other news i've been looking at new cellphones, because my belief that mine is fixable is tenuous at best.  the top selling points about every new phone seem to be that it is no bigger than a deck of cards and it has the very best of jessica simpsons songs for ring tones.  god help me.  i need a phone with the ability to withstand extensive trauma and maybe one that will just go "bring bring" or similar instead of (and i'm really not kidding about this) tia's phone which is set to sing "achey brakey heart" when her ex calls. 

as much as i had hoped to make my stint in the banking world short, there's no reason not to try to make as much as i can while i'm here right?  so i'm looking into the very boring world of bank classes.  they're free, you get mileage and 5 bucks for dinner, so why not.  one i have to take is called telephone etiquette.  it's a three hour seminar.  on telephone etiquette.  talk about blog fodder. 

today we got trail mix from the cafe milagro.  one of our favorite non customers brought it for us.  she's also the one who brought us the almond chocolate chip cookies from the pearly gated morning glory bakery.  the moral of this story is, if you bring your bankers cookies and trail mix and treats in general...they will be your slaves. 

and just because i saw these words and it made my day: Elf Repair 
that there stirs a barrage of imagery.  i'm hoping to get lots of hits for Elf Repair in the future instead of porn. 

tia is preparing for her big wig meeting that may mean she'll be leaving our branch.  sometimes  she is a trial, but it will be even worse to be shorthanded for an eternity. 

according to mr. word of the day the word of yesterday was inebriated and so i suggest that the word of today be lugubrious.  which he liked very much. 

you know those scooter chair things that are advertised on tv for the locomotivally challenged...i just saw one drive, or well scoot really, down the middle of the road.  like with the cars.  it was something.

sometimes i can only see what's wrong  and sometimes i'm convinced my god has up and gone, i'll never write  a really big huge hit song, my love will leave me hanging on, but everything i need is right here in my hands
 
because man, that song has been seriously stuck in my head.  for a long long time.  this weekend was one of those "and the next season will be locusts" sort of weekends.  saturday it was rainy and cold and foggy and i almost had to turn on the heat.  and sunday it was hot, and it was sunny, and it was beautiful.  and now it's foggy again.  one day last week the little mountains on the edge of the water looked like they were covered in that white craft fuzz.  it was like giant heaps of marshmallows coming out of the ocean.  it was cool. 

and i think i finally killed my phone.  well, not completely, just the talking part.  i can still send texts, i think.  i've dropped it lots of times, and it's never broken before but i think i might actually have killed it this time. 

whoa lady, whoa.  some woman i didn't know almost stomped out because she didn't have id to cash her check.  "i have two accounts here, but i guess i'll go somewhere else where they'll cash my check."  this is the second spoiling for a fight customer i've had recently and i just don't get it.  for the record i am probably the most lenient of id askers at the bank, i only ask when i really have never in my life seen you before.  but i'm not going to hand over hundreds of dollars because you say i've helped you before.  and neither would anyone else.  but if you have accounts here and you don't have id, we can still cash your check.  it would take all of 8 seconsd for you to tell us your ss# and the problem is solved.
but then someone just brought us ice cream so clearly all of our customers don't think we're evil shrews.

ooh oooh and i almost forgot.  this morning a tourist from NJ beeped at a fire ambulance with siren blaring because it turned ahead of them.  what the hell is the world coming to?

hey sarah!  remember that time we went up cadillac and it was foggy and you stood outside for five minutes in the fog and got completely soaked?  that's what today is like.  and well actually yesterday was like that too, and probably tomorrow.  i'm reading another charles todd book.  he writes foggy british mysteries and so the weather is very appropriate.  aslong as it's british it's ok if it's foggy and people die. 

i just got some scoop on miguels.  they lowered their prices and changed their menu a few weeks ago...i wonder why?  the waiter that i talked to claims that it is now about the same as before it sold but one can't be sure.  we'll have to go read the menu and see.  if they expect to last the winter they're going to have to prove themselves as cheap and as good as they were before the sale.  i don't know anything about xyz but apparently the new anthony's is extra expensive too in order to separate the tourists from as much of their money as possible.  annie, maybe if the menu looks more reasonable we could try it out and invite xander and anne?
 
mr.blog has been getting lots more attention lately according to statcounter and i'm wishing i had been more saavy when i started the blog.  wouldn't it have been grand to harbor petty annoyances about who else in the dorm was reading our blogs?  think of the arguments and bitching we missed out on.  life sucks...goes on lunch break.

i almost forgot that mr. cell phone came back to visit us.  he wanted to know where he could send a fax in town.  and we sent him down the street with directions.  this time atleast he didn't assume that we didn't have the technology.  based on my notes of the exchange i didn't think we were very nice but i suppose we must have been.  wonder what he'll ask tomorrow. 

i like kids, but i can't eat a whole one

 

on friday one of my jamaican boyfriends asked me if i have any kids.  i said something along the lines of "no. what, are you crazy?"  they all have kids and they were all sending money home to support them.  i think i need to read up on jamaica, cool runnings alone probably isn't the best cultural guide. 

i am thinking about starting netflix.  i have the feeling that it will become an addiction and i'll start to see the video store as some kind of methadone clinic.  particularly when the long cold winter comes.  i like getting mail, and watching movies.  how could something so right be wrong?

 

man comes in after using the atm
"do you have cell phones up here?"
"yes...uhh why"
"my cell phone doesn't work."
"uh huh"
"i'm from chicago, my phone works fine there."
"ahh, well. sorry it doesn't work."
"ohh...so you don't know how to make my phone work?"
"uhm no, sorry"
"ok, bye"

and because there hasn't been a political chat on this page for a while look here. mr. bush is trying to postpone the election incase of an act of terrorism. maybe that sounds a bit too harsh, he's reseearching the legality of such a postponement should something happen. man, lincoln had a actual domestic war going at full speed and he didn't try to pull that shit. lincoln's words about it are at the bottom of the article and they're very beautiful. but lincoln wasn't afraid to lose. he actually cared about the will of his people. unlike bush on both counts. i don't know for sure but i think most people think lincoln was a pretty cool guy and a very decent president. unlike our current "war" president, lincoln really hated war.
and although that rant is hardly finished...tia was just saying that the infamous "they" are telling the service men away that they probably won't be able to vote because the absentee ballots won't get back in time. what the hell is that about?

you know how in the dorms the shower only has three settings: hot, too hot, and liquid fire from hell. my home shower, since the horrible days of no water, has completely lost the ability to have a reasonable temperature. my skin is still tingling from the hot.
ooh ooh i finihed painting my chairs last night and cleaning the kitchen/dining/computer room. how do you name a room when it has so many purposes, which one do you choose. i'm tempted to call the kitchen/dining room the food parlour and the bed/living room the resting salon, or the entertainment and slumber chamber, or i could be a bit british and call it the bed-sitting room. maybe the kitchen could be the dining kitchenette. any thoughts?
today i have an appointment at the dentist. hopefully i'm just getting sealants as i gloated about my non cavity status. i brushed like a fiend this past month, but then maybe that was the problem. sarah?
it looks tragically like it's going to rain today. it's not a good sign that all the tourists have their coats on. i someone with a sweatshirt and a scarf yesterday. where are these people from that they're cold. where is it so hot that 75 is a bit chilly? i can't figure it out.

apparently if you're in a hurry, and you've lived here for thirty years, but you don't bank here even though it's closest to your business, i should go out of my way to make change for you ahead of customers. and when you're rude to me i should see how i've wronged you and fall to my knees and raise the dollar bills and quarter rolls on a velvet pillow slowly up to your hands while averting my unworthy eyes. bitch.

i had a dream about a floppy ferris wheel that proves to me that they are dangerous and scary. the dream people were riding it and they didn't seem to mind that it was floppy. but then dream people do all sorts of unreasonable things. i do remember that we were looking for the snack stands at the dream carnival. so the priorities were still there.
i've been putting off making a doctor's appointment for months and now i have one this afternoon and i don't want to go. i hate those gowns. i don't hate needles, or blood, it's the gowns. thinking about floppy ferris wheels and hospital gowns so close together is making me nervous. all i need really is a new thyroid prescription. i don't need a gown to have my blood drawn. they only need a arm. why all the fuss? it would save them laundry if they didn't make me change. it would save water. it would be better for mother earth if i didn't change in to the icky gown. i wonder if they'll see my point?

oh dear. i think i'm getting some sort of cold. this is no time for sniffles. on the upside i just ordered our very own copy of cool runnings which for some reason we really enjoy watching. alot. and also the vicar of dibley divine set which i'm really looking forward to. and later today i'm going to look into getting the thing that makes your bike stationary. so i can ride it when it's raining. in my house. watching british tv. it's like make your own spinning class. but without the spandex. what could be better.

it's official, two days in the bank with no option to leave is too many and makes one completely insane. as witnessed by annie yesterday. this morning i went to check my mail. it's so freeing to be able to go outside.
so, blog. it seems like we're all summertime forgetful about our blogging. or maybe we have such fabulous lives that we can't be bothered to describe the minutiae for the web universe. in addition to being trapped in the bank...i've had a very exciting week. monday two of my neighbors popped by. next door accidentally broke her phone line and was knocking before i got my shoes off. she thinks kitty is pretty but did not like bug for a name. below neighbor came up to tell my my toilet is leaking on her counter, but that tedd was coming to fix it and if i could use the other one instead for the time being. i feel terrible about the leak, and more terrible that her kitchen counter is so much bigger than mine. if they had both come at the same time it would have been like a block party, but without snacks.

i don't think i've gone this long without blogging for a long time. it's easy to get out of the habit when i'm not at work.
so as sarah said, she is home now. the week of sarah fun is now over. we ate alot, we drove around, we saw the deer isle parade and now i'm back at work after a nice long weekend spent cleaning the house.
kitty misses sarah. i can tell. she's venting her misplaced anger about sarah's absence at the neighbor cat who keeps trying to sit on her window. the bitch. it's been a very emotional week for kitty with the thunder and the fireworks and then sarah leaving.
we're quite busy here. apparently the Post Office is refusing to take travelers checks if you don't spend enough money. there were some very confused british folk here earlier. i said "that sounds like the post office" and they said "well then, it's just like ours." i heart cute british people.

mr. confederate flag/from my cold dead hand has been coming in rather often and you know, he's not that bad. he's always very kind to me and calls me ma'am. maybe he's not from maine. maybe it's because i'm whiter than the driven snow. maybe he has to buy all his clothes from an uber conservative, angsty thrift shop. maybe i should keep my opinions about my customers to myself and stop being so hostile.

and my favorite keyword is

"make your own ice luge kit"

thanks to the dear soul who searched the above and found me. that makes my day!

the consensus is that kitty has gotten too fat. she was a stray. i think she deserves some leeway(sp?). but i did give her a little less yummy chicken in gravy this morning and she meowed at me when she realized the discrepancy. life is hard. i gave her some hairball treats to compensate. i wouldn't want her to get desperate.
sarah and kitty are becoming fast friends. kitty sits on her lap every chance she gets and they chat. and per above, sarah is often to be seen petting kitty with two hands and saying "faaaaat". that's love.
so i replayed the whole job interview from yesterday and decided that i was an idiot. of course you think of a thousand things to say when it doesn't matter and is in fact too late. and probably everyone thinks they're an idiot after an interview. i just have to hope that everyone else was more idiotic than i. what a thing to hope for.
i realized also today that i have been confusing foreign travelers with my speech. not so much slang, but just unusual words. when someone asks me something at the bank, like "can i cash this?" if i can, i say "absolutely" in a dazzling and positive way. it's better than yes, it's a guarantee. but i've noticed that the german folks, and the french folks and definitely the russian folks have no idea what i'm talking about. i think they know it's a positive response, but somehow i don't think it's covered in berlitz english. i surely don't know the equivalent in spanish or french for all my years of study, so maybe i should just say "yes", and leave it at that. i enjoy the international customers more than tia or mary. tia prefers that all people speak english and look like her. mary, i think, just doesn't like to be misunderstood. i think it's nice that other people like to come here. i would like to think that while i was traveling foreign bankers would be so enthusiastic about cashing my travelers checks that they confused me totally with the dazzling and positive language.

i don't think it went very well. sigh.

awww! someone in yonkers found the blog with "Bar Harbor Romantic thing to do". and i'm always so poohy about new yorkers. now i feel guilty. i will atleast until one tries to run me over again.

the car passed, but i had to get a new tire. or rather my parents had to get me a new tire. my mom was actually upset because she thought it was too cheap. i guess she wants me to be safe or something. ooh but the best part of getting the car inspected is the new sticker. it's the very best shade of pink. my favorite shade of pink. sort of the color of the links that haven't been clicked on. i realized this when i put on the registration stickers 2 minutes before inspection and i was so happy. i love that color. love it. i thought it was a good omen, and i guess i should be glad that all it needed was one new tire. but aren't they supposed to need two at a time. isn't that something you replace in pairs? clearly, i don't know.
in other news holly and i relived our youth by shopping for hours and buying nothing. which we both decided was a good thing. and then we got ice cream. 5 dollar sundaes. five dollars. at friendly's. and people are worried about gas prices. it's the ice cream that's going sky high. and really, what's more important than ice cream?
and now we have a sarah. who is probably still sleeping. i keep thinking of things like if i told her where the towels are? i'm sure she'll figure it out. goodluck sarah!

oh man, i was just on a roll and i erased it. blah. i'm not feeling bloggy. things have been really busy at work, people want money, and travelers checks, and maine state quarters. and really folks are appaulled that we don't have a supply of our state quarter. to be fair i do have some new hampshires, and a maryland so really i'm doing my bit.
we just had a lovely woman from texas. who was everything a vacationing texan should be. she had alot of shiny jewelry, she had big hair, she was very polite and complimented the state. she appreciated today's sun and didn't yell at us because it rain yesterday. what a nice tourist. it's really hard when people yell at you because it's raining. it's not actually our fault it's raining. or foggy. or whatever.
i was conducting independant research on cars yesterday, part of a fanatical thought freight train that i won't go in to just now. maybe in a few weeks. but anyway, cars. i am remembering back to when we went to pick up kirsten's new car, a toyota corolla from the dealership. and ofcourse we all know how dealerships like to see you as much crap as possible. mud flaps, top coats, you know the thing. so the lady was trying to talk kirsten, who incidentally had no hand in buying the car except that it was under her name and having not even a drivers liscense, her car knowledge was negligible, into extra insurance. (did you follow that?) extra insurance because her car is the most stolen. did you know it costs more to insure cars that are stolen alot. i guess it makes sense, on some level. but as we amies (amy mas was there too) pointed out to her, corollas are also one of the countries most popular and abundant cars so it goes hand in hand that since there are so many corollas, just hanging around in parking lots and garages and stuff that the law of averages on their theft must be higher. right? so because i wonder all the time how it is fair that because your type of car gets stolen alot you should have to pay more, because really it's a corolla. who thinks corolla is a car you have to worry about. good gas mileage, reliable engine. it's not a sexy car. it just doesn't seem right.
anyway, so i was researching the expense of insuring cars. not surprising the geo prizm, which is just like the corolla, is not on top of the high theft lists. but saturns are. old model saturns. and another list had the bonneville on it in number 3. it just doesn't make sense. there seems no rhyme or reason.
i thought car thiefs liked bmws. aren't bmws and mercedes supposed to be stolen alot. aren't they most worthwhile to steal? i mean really, saturns and corollas. are there hordes of busy moms with ready money to buy a hot corolla? preferably with one of those retractable window shades for the back seat. do the car thugs know they'll pay extra for one of those?
i don't even know where that rant came from. but i feel lied to. people on tv don't steal a 1997 saturn sedan. the saturn sedan doesn't appear in the Viper car alarm commercials. it's just wrong.

and also i heard this while out on my lunch break "DON'T HIT ME, I'M LOCAL" as this girl tried to cross the street in front of generic asshole new yorker # 5.

my new wisdom tooth is having a growth spurt. it hurts. but it's not pressure. i was told to look out for pressure, and to report said pressure immediately. but i have decided that it is not pressure, it's just pain.
yesterday was a beautiful day, and saturday was the icky. yesterday i dried my laundry in the sun, and cleaned my whole house, and went to the camp with annie and it was so beautiful. and saturday, oh saturday was a miserable excuse for a weekend respite. it would have been exciting because i got my new bike. but i spent half an hour in a downpour struggling to put said new bike into my car. the manual is all sad and wet because i needed it to figure out how to take the wheel off. and then i spent the rest of the day in bed watching movies. and i felt better. would have been better with chocolate though...oooh chocolate.
i'm all distracted because it's lunch time. and i have to call about a job at coa.
it's an admissions counselour job. which could be cool. but she prefaced the message with the salary is very small. that's probably not a good sign, but it's definitely worth a call back.

and in addition to that. most people, say christians, don't actually take the words in the bible, or whatever book, as absolute truth. do they. i mean rational people.
tia's church rings more of cult every day.

oh my god. tia just told us that war is supposed to happen because it's in the bible. and when the day of reckoning comes there will be a flash of light and she will be gone. partying in the next world. or something to that effect. oh how i wish she was kidding.

there are a lot of people going to canada today. apparently going to canada is the shit. i want to go to canada. i think we should go to canada. although, maybe not on the cat because we might throw up. i don't want to throw up on canada, it would be disrespectful. but i think we should go. sarah, can you dig it. we could visit ontario, we could visit montreal, we probably shouldn't visit saskatchewan because it's very far.
and although the canadian dollar is not quite as bad as 2:1 it's still cheap. we should go. let's go. let's all go.

so now that's settled, i got my hair cut. the lady said she was going for meg ryan. don't panic. it is not at all meg ryan. it's just shorter and curlier. i just thought it was amusing to aim for such a goal. i mean really, would i ever walk in to a salon and ask for meg ryan hair. not that she doesn't have lovely hair. you understand. i am quite glad to have my hair cut though. it was getting wild. like crocodile hunter wild. curls shooting out the side of my head. it was a sight to behold i tell you. i'm glad it's been tamed.

so i'm officially not an employee at my part time job anymore. lasted a whole night. the feelings are mixed, i could really use the money. but a defined schedule like that just isn't possible with having to go home and being available for mommy, and having to do laundry. and so we're tightening our proverbial belts in the king's household. no reckless spending. please god, no more reckless spending. execpt in canada. when we go. to canada. it's nice there.

according to annie bats can enter through very tiny holes. i guess sort of like a mouse can get anywhere it's nose will fit. and so last night, in a fit of brilliance, i bug and bat proofed my screens. it was so simple. so obvious. i put a strip of foam tape on top of the screen. and voila! i'd like to see the moths try to get to my light now. HA!
i had a dream last night that i was working in a factory, atleast i think it was a factory. there were all these huge machines every where. and they were all humming. and the humming was getting louder and louder until really it was roaring. and we kept waiting for the machines to explode. and when i woke up kitty was sleeping on my head purring.
speaking of kitty, we've decided to call her bug. it's a versatile and meaningful name. it could mean she's a love bug, or a snuggle bug or because she sometimes bugs us. it's perfect.

so last night, very late, i woke up to kitty meowing and playing. i really didn't want to turn on the light, but i did. and she was playing with something rather larger than a june bug and very black. it didn't seem to be moving. my sleepy eyes couldn't really tell what it was, and frankly i don't like dealing with creatures or huge bugs in the dark so i told myself it was probably her cat nip toy and i went back to bed.
and this morning, oh this morning. there was a tiny and very dead bat on my floor. kitty had given up on it as a play thing and was waiting for breakfast. so i scooched it into yesterdays rice pilaf box as a coffin and tossed it into the dumpster. the real question though is how did it get in? and does he have friends.
i know bats are good, and they eat bugs, but i don't like them. not at all. i'm glad they eat the bugs but there are more bugs outside than in my house (amazingly enough) and i think the bats should stay outside. and also it's safer with no kitty to attack them.

it is freaky ass little tall island weather. yesterday was a complete nightmare and we decided it was because of the weather. t was out sick and mary and i were running non-stop. the days go by so fast when it's busy though, it was sort of refreshing.
and last night we went out on the town. annie did more shopping and we walked our tired butts around bar harbor quite a bit. and now she will know what time it is, and not be sun burned.
we've fixated on a new scheme, bikes. we think if we had bikes we'd ride them. this is debatable, but it would be nice. we also decided that we need a bike rack because it's way to scary to ride around town. the drivers are too crazy and we're too unskilled as bikers to guarantee our safety. also, as annie said this morning, i could get my bike free. the bank offers money to people who do fitness things and they might pay for it. annie is the smartest. that would suit our ambition perfectly and cost me no money.
i haven't gotten around to a bunch of things...like cleaning my house or making hair appointments or quitting my new job. i really should call them, huh? maybe at lunch time...

would it be wrong, or say obsessive, to call up millenium developement in frederick or scott gas and investigate? this tracker thing is making me a maniac.