"snowmen don't fly...unless you kick em!"

ruthlessly stolen from sarah's archives, which are very inconvenient by the way, because it's my favorite and it makes me laugh and i'm bored...

"As many of you know, I have issues with the Jesus Fish. You know, those little outlines of fish that are often found on the backs of minivans and other various vehicles. Sometimes they have Greek writing in the middle. You may have also seen some of the "response fish" that the Jesus Fish has spawned, like the Darwin fish with legs, etc., you all ride in cars, you all know what I am talking about. Anyway, back to the Christ Cod. My question is, What is the point? Well, the point, dear lady, you might say, is to signify that the owner of the car is a Christian. Once again, I reply, so what? In the first couple centuries A.D., Christianity was an underground cult that had fervent followers, but was reviled by the public at large, kind of like the polka scene today. Special symbols that only Christians knew were used so that they could identify each other--symbols like the chi-ro (sp?) and the fish. It was necessary to keep it all on the down-low because in the Roman Empire, Christians often ended up as lion kibble. Today, all a Christian has to do to find another Christian is, well, spit. Chances are it'll land on someone who is a member of some branch of the religion. Also, if you publicly reveal your Chrisitianity, the government won't execute you in a giant brass pressure cooker shaped like a bull. So basically, all of the above is to illustrate that the purpose of the Jesus Fish is to say, "Look at me. I am a Christian and I am so hardcore into Jesus that I glued this fish to my car, ultimately bringing down its value in the name of Jesus Christ our lord, amen."