since i got on the healthy lifestyle bandwagon i've been thinking alot about my history with exercise. pretty much that would be gym class. 45 minutes a day, three times a week, pretending like i did whatever it was we were supposed to have done. i hated gym class. the only good thing about gym class was when holly was with me. but holly was alot more talented with sports than i was, there's a shrine to prove it, so she wasn't as afraid as i was.* i was up nights thinking about how much i didn't want to go to gym class. class itself was rarely dissapointing in being fucking scary.

there's a feast of reasons to hate gym class. you could not be picked for a team and have to wait for the teacher to place you on a team while everyone on that team groans loudly.** you could get hit out in dodgeball within nanoseconds of the game starting, depressing. or you could have to do gymnastics on balance beams and springboards with no training at all. the latter happened to me in 6th grade. holly was with me and we successfully bullshitted our way into getting no further in our gymnastics careers than performing summersaults over and over again. take that kerri strugg.

i remember that in the seventh grade we were tested in our ability to do sit-ups and push-ups and the like. they counted how many we could do and wrote it down. i think this was my favorite gym class ever. the summer before 7th grade i had decided i was fat and i was determined to do something about it. so for hours every day i holed up in my room and did sit-ups and push-ups while watching re-runs on wnds.*** however sad and misguided, i kicked ass on that gym test. so much so that one of the whiniest skinny girls**** i ever knew had the gaul to ask me if i was lying about how many sit-ups i did. i was really proud that day. i don't know what happened to that kind of willpower and singlemindedness. it wouldn't hurt me today to spend some time doing sit-ups and push-ups. nah...


*her parents have a case full of the medals she won ice skating and they refuse to take it down.
**i think i've mentioned that i was that kid who's only goal scored in their life was on their own team. so i guess the groaning was with good reason and i can't really blame them.
***this was the new england independant station and the only station i received on the tv in my room, it adds appropriately to the sadness of my 12 year old life. i should also mention that this is the summer my mother decided i had an eating disorder because i would only eat toast. i just really liked toast, and i was too lazy to cook anything else for myself during the day. i remember she took me out to lunch at friendly's to get me to eat something and then she wouldn't let me order ice cream because it would make me fat. irony?
****her name is emblazened on my brain. she's the same girl who convinced my 8th grade history team to perform a dance for a class project. THE HORROR!