it's been raining all week. i have nothing remotely interesting to say. the weeks seem to be flying by but the days just drag. my sister called to tell me they're having a mass for mom on the 16th. it came so fast. i never thought this year would end. and then you get to the end and you realize grief doesn't end at any one turning point of time. and you wonder how you got through the days only a year ago, only six months ago.

mother's day is sunday. last year i made my mom a card. she couldn't keep her eyes open to read it and fell asleep with it in her hands. it's going to be a harder month than i thought.