other weird things that have happened tonight, besides my mom's weird comment. 1. i passed a house with like 15 cards with sununu stickers on them. must be a fun party. and B i seem to have broken my jaw. it's extremely ouchy and i have no idea how i did it. OUCH! and we are not sure about her comment but we think she's having a nervous breakdown so don't be too concerned.

"isn't anne's voice strange, i always think it's a male" says my mother. hmmm.

spent most of the day helping emily wallpaper her ceiling. we talked about our crazy parents. apparently mom has said all sorts of weird things about leaving dad to emily. never to me, of which i am quite glad. emily thinks mom is a tragedy magnet. we concur.(?). she was worried about making other people cry at the funeral because she is so upset. she met this man twice. she's supposed to be a counselor for crying out loud. AHHHH.

oh god, so sick of home.

morning. no plans. what to do...

have to go pick up meme. sigh.

this is a special note to dearest shavonne: amy is a very forgetful girl but just because it takes her six years to return phone calls it doesn't mean she doesn't love you anyless. she is just an asshole. and she is sorry. i have found the most amazing things in my room. a set of knives and cutlery for our house. (brand new unopened) a mahjong game(if anyone wants to learn to play mahjong let me know and i'll bring it back to school) many baby pictures, all my gardening books, and several other things are coming back to school with me. we hope sarah packed light! she knows me. there is also a print i want to bring but it's framed and i'm sure that i will kill it. but i think i'll try anyway because it's MINE!!! and i'm certain that all of my things will become refuse if i don't remove them. sorry sarah. but yay for mahjong. and we haven't even finished our shopping yet. semi-annual trip to sam's in my future. i don't know what i'll walk out with but there will be plenty of it.

i finally got to wake up without the phone ringing in my ear. yay. although it's 821 and we're not sure why i am awake at this hour. i think i'll do some laundry. exciting day ahead...

today: went shopping. bought some nice clothes and some pink pumas. actually i didn't buy the pumas before anyone gets excitable about my collection. i returned something that actually cost more, so there. and we know i don't need more pumas. we are aware of this. but we couldn't prevent it. it was meant to be. they were the right size, and the only pair, and so cheap...i'm weak. i admit this. but atleast i have cute feet!!!

this morning my dad was yelling at my mom about my car. instead of asking me for my keys to move and clean it, there had to be yelling downstairs. either way it was going to wake me up. and it seems that my father has cleaned and moved my car not so that he can go anywhere but because he could make a scene about it for no apparent reason. sigh.

christmas is over. yay. it's snowing alot. yay. my father started yelling first thing this morning. i think i'm going to have an ulcer by january. woohoo. my sister ate half a box of chocolates and is rolling on the floor in agony. haha. and she had to carve the roast, she accidentally touched it and started screaming. it's been quite the day. i don't think i want to celebrate christmas anymore. unless you have a baby it's really not fun. oooh but i'm so excited it's snowing. YAY FOR SNOW!!!

vile christmas eve party over. yay.

christmas eve is going very slowly. i already made my first trip to the super market. i'm ready for a nap.

emily's house always has a fresh cake. that's alot of cake. yikes

saw weird things today. 1. harley davidson had large isreali flag up out front. b. homemade bumper sticker " 1 cross + 3 nails =4gvn" we are NOT sure.

came home, no parents, door locked, no key. had to wait. sigh.

mail on sunday and small children bringing us coffee cake. life is good.

woke up to phone ringing in ear. sister wants sitting of baby so she can get her hair cut. too sleepy to say eat it. must go play with reid at 12. must also go to post office and have overwhelming desire to go to goodwill. i don't suspect goodwill will be busy for christmas, atleast not the yuppy goodwill(this is what my mother calls it, you can get donna karen any day in the yuppy goodwill) yay for designer recycling???

i got a kitten. in the mail. YAY!!!

"if you don't hold this tree up it's gonna fall" well gee. really. how many times did i hear this today.

i was going to go to the post office today, but i had to take the kitty to the doctor. he was not happy with me. he weighs 19.1 pounds. yikes man. he has to go on a kitty diet. he left little sweaty paw prints on the table because he's so nervous. awwwwww. he wasn't happy in the carrier, but then there was another kitty loose in the waiting area and he was happy to be able to stay in his cage. there was also this weird man with a ferret who would not stop talking. i woke up to my parents fighting. or rather my father yelling at my mother about the floor. it's been a big day.

i keep having to remind myself that i do not hate being home, or home in general. i don't really. there isn't so much to hate about it. and yet i'm so unhappy here. this is just not where my life is. i feel like i'm on vacation at a very friendly hotel. it's weird. my brother comes down to see if my parents are around before he brings down his bottles. umm, they know you're an alcoholic, they live here. he's so stupid. i have to sit for reid tomorrow. i suspect he'll be in tears when his father gets home. anyway. my meme was making fun of my driving when i took her home. i hope i get to be an old person like her, just sort of doo dee doo and laughing all the time. she has no idea what's going on. she asked if i was memeknapping her because she didn't recognize the way i took her home. so sad. you know what else is sad, i realized tonight that it is not at all dark in nashua at night. i was driving down this road that i've always needed my highbeams on at 11 pm and i didn't at all. it was downright bright out. whoa dudes, that is so not cool!

it is late and amy is tired but amy is sad because everyone she loves is far away. sigh.

my meme just gave me alot of money. it makes me feel like a big jerk and then my dad says "take it, she's got plenty and she's just gonna die" so ironical.

so apparently i published that thing about reid too many times. my dad asked me why anyone would want to blog. hmmm. like he cares. it's three oclock and i just showered. according to sarah we were on the phone for quite some time. we must be in love. my father is asking me what sarah's mom does. we're not sure. we're really not sure why he cares. i don't really have to escape my mom, so much. she's just weird. she's really not even here all that much. off to fetch my meme! ooh, and pizza for dinner. they feel that this is in some way a reward for me. my parents are SO cute.

in the words of amy meek, some bitches need to get blogging. grrrrr.

morning all! it's a beautiful morning and my parents aren't home. i had cookies for breakfast. yay. i have to call sarah today or annie will not be happy with me. sarah and i must pick a date for our visit. that is atleast one task to give my life meaning today. also, i must take meme to the podiatrist. actually i like my meme, she's very funny, you just have to be patient. which i can do when necessary. must also get gas and go to target. i was driving around near my house yesterday and i realized that there is like a whole new mall going up. oh yay. i used to think our part of town was sort of run down, but that's so much better than having a new dunkin donuts, home depot, pizza hut and target within a mile. yikes man, yikes.

oooops again

ooops

reidles actually recognized me tonight when we picked him up from school. then he said he didn't love me. but hey, he's three. he did cry when i left. so fickle. the lady asked me if i was mailing anything hazardous. like anyone mailing something hazardous would say yes. anyway, i said it's cookies and she said so yes? not funny post office lady. i got my floppy drive today. talk about service. my dad was really impressed. he was also impressed with the cookies i made. then he made me stare at the back of the refridgerator for 15 minutes while he turned on the water. much like my mother he started another project and never released me from refridgerator bondage. and i just sat there so he wouldn't yell at me. we're both fools. mommy dearest requires solitaire. adios!

just finished baking. yay. good fun. now i am off to the post office. woohoo!

i just saw a nun selling vessels for holywater on tv. holyshit.

i forgot to blog about the package i received yesterday. from my sister. after i let my dad go out and get the mail because there wouldn't be any mail for me...i got a package and the tuition bill. yay. but anyway i got the cutest calendar from grandmastah phris in japan. it's little t shirts on little hangers that have the calendar printed on them. how very christine. also little koi magnets and such. i must send her something... i'm the worst sister ever. i didn't even have her new address until she sent the package. my mother called her last night and woke her up for work. apparently she moved to a less good part of town but there are more foreigners and people don't notice her so much, yay for that. she used to have this guy that would sit on the porch of the apartment across the way and stare at her. weird. she said it's not like america where you end up dead, they just don't know it's rude. school children apparently say very rude things to her all the time that they learn from tv or whatever...she fears that someday they are going to get beat up. after the conversation my mother told me that my sister speaks so beautifully and so well...it's a shame you have to say dude all the time. she didn't really say that but it was right on the tip of her tongue. dude, whatever. i totally speak with class, like all the time. oh well.

amy mas commented! life is good

i have the two most unfortunate songs in my head. 1. Noah...was a knower...he knew the heart of GOD. and b. motown philly. someone help me. please!

so that was the most interesting phone message i've ever recieved. thank you laura faris. I was studying with efficiency but then i got grrry so i came home. atleast i don't have to compose a piece in three minutes like emily miller. that would really suck. i have to remember to pay for my pictures before i go home. i must remember. so ahh, more studying to do. i really just don't care that much about geography. i think i'll go hang out with the kids at the dining hall and study while they eat. is that wrong. is that not in fact studying. do i really care. mmm not so much. i have not taken care of my internship which means that i feel like shit. ahhh. why do i torture myself like this, huh? grrr to me

"Candle in her Deal"
goodbye memorial's ho
though i never f'ed you at all
i heard the stories
of those who did
they crept out of the world wide web
and they crawled into your bed
they made you do things
for 20 bucks you gave them head
and it seems to me you lived your life
with a candle in your deal
never knowing what it was like
to see your f'ing rear
andi would have liked to known what
was up with that
your candle burned out long before
your deal ever did
college life was tough
the toughest job you'd ever tried
hood offered you money
and a room in which you lied
down with the internet trash
oh res life, they hounded you
"we take away your guest priviledges
we swear to god we do"
still i t seems to me youlived your life
with a candle in your deal
never knowing who to stick it to
when bush left for real
she said the only candle that
you guys had in the room
was one of them big ones with 3 wicks
maybe t'was the handle of a broom
goodbye memorials' ho
from the young girls on third floor
who say you not beyond sexual
no more than 'money grubbing whore'
but is seems to me you lived your life
with a candle in your deal
never knowing you'd be notorious
for doin it for a steal
would have liked to known how much
you made that fiscal year
your candle burned out long before
you stuffed it in your rear

Laura Faris ladies and gentlemen

according also to the hood magazine, shriner article, amy masciantonio is class of 04 hahaha

no birthday love in my mail box. however, i did get an A on that awful paper i wrote for dr. bhatt. colleen carrol who had a real topic and real sources got a b+. she was not happy with me. i have not mentioned the birthday love hanging in front of my door. it's lovely but a bit low. i must duck to enter my room. it's a reminder of how much i'm loved. my mother has not called to give me my year's horoscope. i'm shocked. maybe it wasn't good. maybe i shall be hit by a milk truck and she wants to save me the pain of knowing my fate. in the hood magazine today it said that karen bought a house in oregon. thank god oregon is so far away.

i just got online so i could finally change my juno password and now i'm too wired to sleep. internet checkers here i come!

you know like when you trusted someone, and you realize that you shouldn't have, and it sucks. yeah well, it does suck, but it doesn't matter because some people just feel badly about themselves and they do things to hurt you to make them feel better. do they really feel better by making you feel bad? i really hope so, i hope someone got joy of giving me so much pain. but you know what else...some things are in the past and that is where they belong. some things don't need to be said anymore. some things we learn from and move on because that is all there is. some times you can't be enough for two people. in the words of kirsten wolle "I'm sick of half people" and so anything that was left is going to get packed up and put away for ever. because no one needs to relive that shit anymore.

roar. that is all

no school!!!

sarah gave me the best will ever. no tears because we're gonna be together for ever. so no worries. no one's going anywhere. right?

things i should be doing: wills, research on the damned examiner building, internship paperwork, dishes, what else...well whatever. i don't care. this will come as a shock to no one but i really do have too many pairs of shoes. they can no longer fit in my two closets. this is not cool. amy must go to goodwill. she must also pick one of those little things off the giving tree. someone remind her. i just rsvp'd for the history major luncheon on thursday. why did i do that. i was only gonna go to be jj's date, i really have no reason to go. i'm just gonna tell them all i'm taking a year off. oh well, it will be something to blog about anyway. i need to polish elvis' etes, he looks all foggy. the eyes are crossed and one of them is staring at me. it's beginning to freak me out. i'm trying not to think about staying here over break. trying very hard. i have no accumulated funds for such a venture, although i could get a job here and i wouldn't have to quit it in january. UGH to me. i really have no good reason to stay. except money, and that i won't go crazy here. grr to me. i want to go home i just don't want to have to stay so long, you know. everytime i come back for break my mom says "you're leaving already" she's always so disapointed. i need to distract myself from my fate of being home for 6 weeks(minus MANY visits to maine). maybe i'll do one of my things...

so much excitement today. car crash, money from Hewlett Packard, skipped two classes. i feel as though i have nothing to do, and people keep giving me murderous looks because i don't have a million things to do. but we must remember that i have a 20 page paper to write for the winter and i have alot of research to do. so no one should think i don't have work to do. i do, i'm just not doing it just yet.

did you guys know that you can charge aol to your parents phone bill. it's amazing. really it's a free trial and they'll never know. horrible child, right here(points to self). my mother and sister went shopping at 7 this morning. still aren't back. holly called me from shopping hell. poor thing. the house is very weird. the walls are gone. freaky. there really is nothing happening here, so i won't bore you. although as annie heard last night there are very cool lights under the cabinets. all the cabinets. it's amazing.

off to NH tomorrow. no more blogging till sunday. have lovely thanksgivings all of you!

elvisngrcelnd: ruinization, is this a word?
IdiotProdigy: we're not sure
elvisngrcelnd: some girl in my india class said it and i
think it's not a word and it' been frustrating me all day
IdiotProdigy: you should look it up
elvisngrcelnd: she could have just said ruin,
it caused his ruin not his ruinization
elvisngrcelnd: ugh
IdiotProdigy: 20 minutes til french
elvisngrcelnd: will french be your ruinization
IdiotProdigy: 20 minutes til doom
IdiotProdigy: it might

oh the healing power of kittens!

fucking capitalone thinks i'm past due. do we think this is true. no. there is no one on earth more anal about paying bills than me. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

done two essays. desperation is certainly helpful to the overall speed of writing essays.

took a nap, don't want to write essays. don't care so much about essays. i'm very irrational when i sleep. i actually had a dream that i was writing and it screwed me up. i feel like i shouldn't have to write that essay again. life sucks.

we don't know why everyone is always at sheetz. why are we always at sheetz. we must look inside ourselves for the truth.

tiny little emotional breakdown this evening. very small. completely over. did have a lovely sunset. so the evening's balance sheet is well on the happy side. i'm half done my detested history take home. i'm like 5 weeks ahead, it's impressive.

uhhh...another russian history exam. i have exactly twelve hours. hmmm

guess who's downloading a bunch of monsoon wedding songs. guess what we're going to listen to in the car for 8 hours. YAY!!!

elvisngrcelnd: ice cream....mmmmm
Doublejdesigns: *rolls eyes*
elvisngrcelnd: i'm distracting myself
Doublejdesigns: i hadn't noticed
elvisngrcelnd: haha
elvisngrcelnd: i really don't need ice cream
elvisngrcelnd: i'm already screwed up
Doublejdesigns: you need something

i couldn't make myself go in. what the hell?

i smell like raspberries today. i'm not really thrilled about this, but i have to because holly's mom gave me this rapsberry bath deal when we graduated and i just occured to me that that was like 4 years ago. so out of homage to holly's mom i smell like raspberries. i think she got one for everybody...i wonder if grandmastahphris also smells like raspberries lately. my mother bought everyone a brita filter deal. she really bought like 20 and was handing them out to all of my friends that were going to school. like filtered water is going to make or break us at college. it is just so like my mom to think that way. i am off to study. must find resources or atleast pretend resources for my culture of india paper. i'm going by myself. i'm giong to be very distracted. what no one realizes about me is that i distract myself way more than anyone else. i'm a terrible influence on myself. i'll probably go for a bit of a drive, then back up to borders. and then as soon as i've found sources i'll decide i have to be somewhere else and leave. i drive myself INSANE.

it's 9 am and amy is awake. why is it that amy's wake up so early when it's a weekend.

so i evaded the ra's for a whole week. yay for me. being at the piercing place makes me want more piercings and things. i'm ready for bed. kirsten!!! ani will be in harrisburg in march. check it out and i'll go with ya. what to do. i could do my geography but really people, we know i won't. so why not just go to bed and awake refreshed tomorrow. i think it's a plan. amy the mas got a friend for limbo today. she's sore. awwww. so sad. i feel like saying more but i just don't know what.

if cars could burn whale blubber i would so buy you one kirsten. on my high interest credit card that is sucking away my soul like those cute little winterized pooh toys at the disney store. "mastercard gold bought the national soul" more of that woman speaking poetry which annie and the kirsten love so much. i really don't love hearing her either, except that that poem is just so roarrrr. ya know. kirsten and i are debating going to our culture of india class. we really should go. we're going. we really should. ok. it's settled. we might go.

for kristen null and void: don't you wish you could be watching tv while eating fast food meat and talking on a cell phone in your suburban attack vehicle all by yourself?

does anyone think my blogs have become some very complicated to do list? i do. how awful to have to read about what amy should be doing instead of blogging. it's really a chronical of failures. how depressing.

trying to decide what to wear for ominous photoshoot. yikes.

so i wake up this morning after like 10 hours of sleeping and there's this paper under my door. i think...that's my mom's handwriting. it's a list of folks registering for something...how very odd. so i stand there naked with my shower things thinking i'm going insane because this paper so frequently seen in my house has now invaded my dorm room. i decide that it couldn't possibly be my mother who would have written this paper and left it under my door because that's impossible. i open my door and sure enough my mother sent a piece of paper accidentally with my senior ad for yearbook and lea left it under my door for her. somehow i am not at all surprised.

morning all. i missed russian history. so sad. weep. sob.

morning all. i missed russian history. so sad. weep. sob.

number of hair products amy has used today: 4 Number of bobbypins used to tame highly coated mane: 2 Likelihood that amy will revert to emergency hat status: 6 (from a 1-10 scale) Concern amy has for the concern she has placed on her hair this morning: 8 (from a 1-10 scale)

manda the poohbear helped me figure out my computer today, now i can make my own cd's. I'm to be called jamMasterA from now on.

i'm at the libeary preparing to recommence work on the dreaded russian history take home when i realize that microsoft works doesn't work with microsoft word. who knew thousands of dollars of machinery could be so worthless.

i erased the train deal because it was idiotic. i really liked it last night, but that's part of the problem methinks

"he lost his whole family, it's not like they're missing, or left at home, they're dead" "I'd have cried if they killed the dog" Laure and kirsten on the road to perdition

i put on old glasses to help me find my new glasses but i still can't find my new glasses so i'm wearing my old glasses. hmph

that was such a negative blog, i totally forgot about the good news i got today. my drivel got a b+. a b+, is that not amazing? dr. L must really be feeling sorry for me.

all of hood college was in walmart this evening. buying various types of plastic underwear. tres weird. sarah, sarah crocket, queen of the wild frontier...

hey, i almost forgot about my cultures of india exam. i don't know a damn thing that's going to be on that exam. and i'm starting to feel REALLY guilty about dr.L's take home. also because we got a new one and i lost it already. if i were him, i'd so give me a zero. i want a zero. oh well. awaiting the dreaded hall meeting. kirsten and i tried to stay out late and miss it but we couldn't. we are non-rule breakers and it just can't be helped.

and yes i do think dykey is a word

i went on a nice drive to harper's ferry. i meant to go to the libeary afterwards, but i remembered i had to make hotel arrangements for the family for graduation. there are several problems with this. 1) she didn't tell me when she wants to come 2) she didn't tell me who's coming, and 3) i don't think i have a third but you have to have three things right??? so i guess i have to call the house. and see. hmmm.

so i have an internship, in collections, at the civil war medicine museum. YAY. i'm excited. now i have to find the god forsooked paperwork. whoopsy..i wonder there it could be. life would be good if i didn't have so many assignments overdue. shucks. it's so hot in here i might wilt like some oxygen deprived debutante.

hod a very interesting evening with lots of folks in the room. burning cds, having the slowest moving pillow fight known to man, you know, good fun. meanwhile i called my mother who chooses to watch "monk" over talking to me. she wanted me to put it on so we could watch it together. weird. atleast she didn't put the phone down to watch it and forget to say goodbye to me. sheesh

went to kirstens house today. her sister is funny, and so is her mom. in fact they're all funny and it was lovely. we had a very nice dinner at Paradiso (ooooooh) and the scenery was very beautiful. falls colors and such. I hope there's time this weekend for an adventure while the world is still colorful. I really should be working on my ind. study deal but i realized that i only have four sources that are viable. although i could use the thirty million books i got out of the library. hmmm. perhaps it will get done tonight. wish me luck.

my blog has really become a tribute to sarah. it's the ultimate will. but anyway there are deep thoughts to blog, or something. it has come to my attention that time here is passing very quickly. does everyone remember like 2nd grade when every day was an eternity. half an hour in the car was like the longest time expanse of your whole life. that doesn't really make any sense but i'm gonna roll with it. i'm feeling like everything is so fleeting. assignments, phone calls, i have no basis for real time anymore. this worries me but i'm so very blesses in my life. i really am. i screw up all over the place and yet everything goes my way. why am i so lucky? i just don't understand it. I have always tried to figure out my place in the world, in my family, in life, i spend so much time wondering why i'm here. i've gotten over that. i don't want to plan my whole life right now. i just want to let life unfold because there is a plan for me out there and it will unveil itself to me when i am ready to act on it. no more worrying about time.

and also, it is hot like fire in here

i just registered for the LAST time. what a moment.

life with sarah = soft fuzzy war zone. what's wrong with that i ask you. ps, i'm way more violent with poohbear and you should be glad that you weren't stuck in the middle of that shit hiding behind Lois god bless her soul.

i heard she put a candle in her deal

"sarah, why are you screaming?"..."the handy dandy bowl shape of the spoon jettisoned some water toward my crotch" "right there!"sarah mewis ladies and gentlemen.

So i was just thinking about how sarah and i spend most of our time talking about the ferret in her ass and i thought about the time i thought she had class. you know what sarah, that was 1999!

Doublejdesigns: oh...that should be fun....be careful...don't get hit by a car
Doublejdesigns: or mugged
elvisngrcelnd: i almost never do
Doublejdesigns: what...get mugged or hit by a car?
elvisngrcelnd: either
Doublejdesigns: that's good to hear
Doublejdesigns: have had both happen...not a fun experience
Doublejdesigns: granted the car was in park...it still hurt
elvisngrcelnd: you hit a car then
Doublejdesigns: no...it hit me
elvisngrcelnd: in park?
Doublejdesigns: jumped right out in front of me
elvisngrcelnd: explain
Doublejdesigns: i was riding my bike down a pretty steep hill...and i got going to fast....and i couldn't stop and the car was right where i needed to go...and the thing hit me
Doublejdesigns: i went up over the hood and down the other side...i had no skin left on my face and hands
Doublejdesigns: and i jammed all my fingers
elvisngrcelnd: ouchy
Doublejdesigns: yeah...i was like 7

kirsten told me the best story today, a story that is the quintessential kirsten. kirsten wolle was a flower girl when she was a little girl but she refused to throw the petals because she didn't want anyone to step on them. maybe every child does this but this just reassures me that kirsten wolle is ahimsa and always has been.

good afternoon sarah. i was sort of sleeping. thankyou for your comment, i do feel lobotomized. so perceptive. uhhh....irritation...swelling....ointment.....2-3 weeks. Sorry your chow got cancelled!

I have begun the 8th page. yay for me.

"The Russian police, stern, stern but fair" amy misses sarah, why must amy be locked in this awful cement room for the rest of her life??????????????????????????????

so Ang wants to kick both kirsten's and my ass. is that proper grammar? you know i don't think anyone's wanted to kick my ass before. she's mad about my comment because i told her to eat it. who knew anyone could take that the wrong way. alas. i think we could take her kirsten. (sorry von, hope this doesn't anger you, you know us, we aren't serious)

YAY! I might have an internship at the National Civil War Medicine Museum. today is a good day!!!

Doublejdesigns: i had a rather embrassing moment this morning....my pants fell down in staples
elvisngrcelnd: yikes
Doublejdesigns: fornately i was able to catch them before they went all the way down...but i made a kinda big commotion
elvisngrcelnd: hahaha
elvisngrcelnd: don't you always
Doublejdesigns: i dropped everything i had to catch them....very loud..people turned to look
elvisngrcelnd: haha
Doublejdesigns: i guess i didn't tie the draw string tight enough
elvisngrcelnd: i was a spectacle at sheetz this morning too
Doublejdesigns: oh yeah? what happened?
elvisngrcelnd: i went for sugar and such and i think i was talking and giggling with myself
elvisngrcelnd: but i won't tell me exactly what happened because i don't want to know
Doublejdesigns: *chuckles*
Doublejdesigns: i would call that total lack of sleep

thanks to jj and 13 font...i have 4.5 pages. do i feel guilty about working dr. L, not so much

uhm...7:26...no progress. my brain is gone. does anyone think he'll notice if it's only 4 pages instead of 8 and it just sort of ends with battleship potemkin. hmmmmmm

you know what, honey sweet tea has 4 kinds of sugar...ROCK ON!

6:22 and 3.5 pages...hmmmm i still have like 18 hours...

5:54 almost three pages. i work erratically don't i?

one would think when you clicked insert page number that the computer would like put a little 2 down at the bottom, or at the top, you get the idea. why does my insert page number insert a 2 or what have you exactly where i'm typing? is this not odd?

5:15 am two pages

It is 5 am and i have a whole page. annie will be so proud???

uhhh, i never finished typing that alix olsen poem because i broke myself. and how do those things correlate, let me tell you the story. did i already tell the story, oh well don't read this if i already bliggety blogged about it. ok, the story: typing the poem, listening to the poem on the stereo precariously perched above my bed, she talks like REALLY fast right so like every two lines i had to like hippity hop up on the bed to rewind for a second and a half and start over. like 47 and ahalf times. so on the 47.5th time, i'm performing my oh so fabulous dismount by hippity hopping off the bed and the very dangerously slippery carpet on the floor slips while i am oh so gracefully hippity hopping off the bed. result, i was incapacitated. and because i didn't want to risk injuring myself again i never finished typing that poem. you got the gist anyway, she's liberal and mad and dykey and isn't it wonderful?

i just wanted to congradulate kirsten on her blog. i can't imagine anyone who needs to bliggety blog more than kirsten!

i had the most interesting meeting with carin today. she's a nice lady, very like my mom. the beautiful thing about counselors is that you can tell them everything and they just go "ohh". Dr. Monhollon thinks i can still do my independant study. he has faith. i almost feel like i could do it too. isn't that amazing? rock on!

my mom said the funniest things last night regarding my "that way" ness. she believes that it was caused by her hormones when she was pregnant with me, she should've noticed sooner because she is a psychologist after all, and you always had boyfriends. at most, one of these things is true. which do you think? i have another query (pun totally intended but not really relevent) for you all. does anyone thinks it's a problem that i have nin and india arie back to back on my playlist. maybe i'm manic! sigh. i'm glad you had fun von, you're awesome! don't let ang hurt you. just because you love her you don't have to take her shit. You deserve to be treated well.

guess who ran errands today? yes it was me. and i'm planning to go to the library. what happened to amy and who is responsible?

very eventful day. slept late, went on a lovely hike, said teary goodbye to von...and i'm about to clean my room. what a way to end such a nice day, cleaning my room. and yet it's necessary. i'm going to make a goodwill trip, i feel this intense need to purge my life of excess. we know that this is impossible because it's me, and ofcourse i NEED all of the crap i have. example: pipe cleaners, very unnecessary to my lifestyle. 1. i am not a kindergarten teacher B. i do not smoke a pipe. my roommate freshmen year thought i was very like martha stuart. that is so frightening and yet so true.

dragball went off hitchless. yay

please note that this is not finished...she talks really fast!
Attention Shoppers!
Attention 9-5 folks, cell phone masses, the up and coming classes
Attention sports utility, plastic surgery surburbanites, viagra popping gucci shopping urbanites
Attention George Clooney loonies, promise keeper sheep
stockbroker sleepwalkers, big investment talkers, Ricki Lake watchers
Attention walmart congregation, shop 'til you drop generation
Attention Nation!
America's on sale!

We've unstocked the welfare pantry to restock the wallstreet gentry
It's economically elementary because values don't pay
Yes american dreams are on permanent layaway
There was limited availability anyway
The statue of liberty is being dismantled ten dollars a piece
to sit it on your mantle or hang it on your wall
by the small mom and child with lots of sally struthers
sisters and brothers, it's now or never
this deal won't last forever, America's on sale

restrictions may apply if you're black gay or female
and shoppers global perspective is 99% off because most of the boys don't count so well
our ethic inventory's low, because moral business has been slow

this is for holly whom i'm sure doesn't read this (is that a proper use of whom, sarah?) remember when we were beds for halloween. that was funny. well not really. but we thought so then. remember when we almost got beat up by those cheerleaders. you're so buff. 10 32 46 HUT. it's amazing that we actually became people considering the primordial ooze we matriculated from. is that how you spell primordial. you know what's the cutest, maryann and carin sent us all a little gift bag. it had tiny tubes of glitter and nail polish. how adorable. i might paint my nails. hmmm. what a thought. i've done it. it's been a really long time. i used to be all about nail polish. sometimes i scare myself. i'm listening to alice n chains. another vestige of my younger years. scary.

so i'm totally skipping out on my life. but i had things to do right. or so i say. anyway, i'm here and not so much at the historical society. i am the worst. but that's ok. sigh...

Heather's coming to dragball. what fun. someone remind me to get her a guest room. please...

trying out a new comments deal...

manda the pooh hood is not co-ed yet. i can't believe i got an 8 on your quiz. in the words of amy mas "you cheat"

the woman at the beer store said we looked like 2 fisted drinkers. hahaha

amy mas said the beer can live at her house. yay. sarah and i are off to buy large ammounts of alcohol now. i hope poohbear is happy!

i'm listening to my mothers message about my health. she bought a book. i need to stop typing. haha. and i need to drink more water. that's her solution. and potassium. she's so funny. my cousin is going to make her wedding dress at my house. that's nice, random, but nice. i haven't done any work yet. it's all jj's fault, i'm sticking to that. if my comments worked she could post something rude just there. i wonder why it worked for kirsten. so puzzling. anyway. i was doing laundry and there were these freshmen having quite the martha stuart laundry conversation. meanwhile when i do laundry it all goes in together and as much as possible. i'm pretty sure my clothes don't even get clean, just a little bit wet, but the point is about these freshmen. they were totally dissing my laundry practices. I am a scary senior standing right there and they were rude to my laundry. there's going to be a very spirited senior prank for all this nonsense. some one remind me. sarah? ps. kirsten, jj said there's an empty apartment in her building. what fun. there's a hall meeting shortly. you know i hear when you live in a place of your own you never have to go to hall meetings.

went to west minster today. what fun. kirsten and i had a delightful conversation. about ourselves and our apartment. that really is my happy thought these days. for all those i whined to about losing my exam, i found it. i haven't finished it yet, but i found it. it really has to be done tonight. i'm so going to fail. ohwell. i don't care, hahahaha. i feel like i should have more to say at 5 in the afternoon but i just don't. how odd. maybe more later...

AimeyM: your quiz sucks
AimeyM: u cheat
elvisngrcelnd: i cheat
AimeyM: yeah
elvisngrcelnd: maybe you just suck
elvisngrcelnd: oh wow, 10%
elvisngrcelnd: sorry
AimeyM: i got the dyke one right

"will you admit you're an asshole? Will you sign a statement swearing you're an asshole? I said no, I've got my own schedule for these things boys" didn't finish, didn't wake up at 5, must go to class empty handed. but on the upside, i'm absolutely certain that i look like shit.

is there a point in making progress on this if it is all so, i don't even have a word for this kind of awful. it's so pointless to waste all this time writing dribble. i wonder if dr. L will even notice if i don't turn it in tomorrow. probably not. maybe i could get him something by the afternoon. he doesn't notice much. i really don't think i deserve a grade for it, i should just get a zero and move on. i would so not give myself a grade for an exam so late. good thing i don't want to be a teacher huh. i have not slept enough lately to articulate any thoughts on the purges except stalin is mean. he was a mean, mean dude. that's my essay. tres profound. do we think sleep will make me more reasonable. we're not sure. i'm so much better at historiography on the impulse. that doesn't make sense. if this were in an inclass exam it would be so much better, i'm much more able to think when i only have 50 minutes. meanwhile, there have plenty of words to blog with, just none about the purges. purging is bad, killing is bad, stalin is mean. but effective. i have to give him that much. he got what he wanted. so thousands of people suffered and died. dreams can come true.

i have just made the most trite identification of Alexander Kerensky. to awful to even be posted here, alas i'll give it in for a grade. what is wrong with me. uhm, he was a socialist and the uhh armies thought he was a really cool guy, but uhh Lenin said he had to go so they ousted him from the country. tsk tsk, they really should have stuck with the program and killed him, but alas. You'd think Lenin would be more careful, talk about fastidious, but whatever.

poohbear looks so pretty! watch out polite young men!!!

skipped out on the gre, didn't cancel, just didn't go in and take it. i am such a grownup.

orienteering shall be interesting. andy thinks i'm serious. interesting. alas the gre is tomorrow and i don't care. none of that silly academia for me, no sir! my mum called four times, i tried to call her back but the phone is busy. sigh. she'll think i'm dead. atleast they got the sniper, now i can get gas and go to michaels. it really has been an amazing year at hood college, no wonder all of our lives are spiraling out of control.

dr L gave me an extension on my exam till whenever i'm done. he's a god among men. and tea freshmen rock! just so everyone knows.

so i walk into the house and there is my mother like 75 times. all of these women were my mother, it was insane. a bus tour from baltimore, who knew my mothers lived in baltimore. they all had these ridiculous red hats. voluminous hats, with like red sequins and sheer and lace. some of my mothers were wearing the red hat and a red hat pin on their clothes. all with matching red handbags. it was very strange. very strange indeed. i almost had to practice my tour, which sucks on a normal day, but too many of my mothers couldn't climb the stairs and just sat in the gallery and waited. thank goodness. other exciting things, i got a parking ticket for no apparent reason and i thought i had deaccessioned an entire collection of textiles. i'm about to call dr. L and ask for an extension on a take home that was supposed to be due yesterday. do we think he'll agree??? details at 10.

missed geography. yes i'm taking geography in my senior year and there's much more academia than one thought would be required. and no maps to color, i was looking forward to that bit. anyway, off to see heidi and the dress i'm working on conserving. unfortunately there's not a damn thing we can do but vacuum it. the docents keep coming up from downstairs and petting it and saying "oh wow, they had silk then". their insipid comments and their oils are going to be the end of me today i think.

less of spiraling out of control today. sigh...

who figured out the comments??? i'm desperate to know???

Indian Summer

In youth, it was a way i had
To do my best to please,
And change, with every passing lad,
To suit his theories.

But now I know the things I know,
And do the things i do;
And if you do not like me so,
To hell my love with you!

~Doroth Parker

oh wow, someone figured out the comments thing...wish i could figure out how to read it.

the comments thing is getting better, it tells me i have none atleast. but where would you put one if you wanted to???

the vision is starting to go. but i feel like me today. i can even bear to think about the kronstadt revolt. i have sources for my ind. study. i might have an internship at harper's ferry...the beautifulest historical park i have yet seen. i don't care about the gre, i talked to my holly in boston, it's a good day. meanwhile, i've been up for 8 hours and have done very little. that's what all night is for huh. i am so not a scholar.

i am so very much a problem. i slept for like 2 hours, i feel like it was more. i am running so much on like adrenaline that like 2 hours is like 8. meanwhile, i also think sentences such as the previous are ok. hmmm. we're not sure. blaggitybloo, in the eternal words of kristen nolle. my train of thought is so all over the place. i just erased this ridiculously long diatribe about gavrillo princip. diatribe is like my favorite gre word because i remember it from the sat(where incidentally my mum made me take a stupid class). anyway, those who care about gavrillo princip say I (notice the resounding silence).
i'm off to watch some russian movies, maybe i'll fall asleep again. ps, fabulous is so my word.

7 days till the gre. didn't sleep last night, won't sleep ever again. going to call my mom to tell her i'm in tremendous debt and to come out. we'll see. i'm so tired it might just happen. ugh. thinking about my apartment with kirsten and laura and who all else (we know you want to annie?), very peaceful. with a puppy. yay for puppies.

do i forget about my meetings or do i just not go? we're not sure.

it's a celebration indeed. it's a great day at hood college. males in the dorms. fabulous. i feel like saying more but there just isn't anything to say...

How blogworthy is Hood going coed next goddamn fall. next fall. oh my god. meanwhile this is all hearsay. you know, washington post hearsay. the whole metro area knows our fate before us. no one at hood ever could keep a secret. i have nothing else to say right now, the candle's going out.

i try so hard and it just never works, why is that?

what happens to you when you can't get off your bike, anyone?

so last night, i'm sleeping, sleeping, minding my own business. thunderous clap behind my head. nothing there, nothing in the hallway, nothing on the floor. this is not a good thing.

Internet checkers is my reason for living. someone shoot me.

shannon's here, yay, i have to work all tomorrow, boo! third entry, day one. kirsten actually noticed it. HI KIRSTEN! i'm so tired...

my mother calls me to say nothing. she calls to listen to me breath. how bizaar.

all of these posts say 10:30 am, it's not 10:30 am, just so you all know!